If you’re just now reading my blog for the first time, click on any of the interesting-looking categories to the left to read some of my past posts, or just click “Start Here” up at the top of the page.  It’ll get you started, at least, so you’re not lost or confused!  And if you aren’t sure about a term I use in my post, check out the Definitions page.


Despite my middling success (or outright failure, if you believe these girls) as a sugar daddy, one of the most highly-read and highly-commented on posts on my blog is The Beginner’s Guide to Being A Sugar Daddy.  It seems like everyone wants to know about the inner workings of “sugar” relationships, and I’ve actually gotten quite a few e-mails, tweets, DMs, and sexts (ok, the last one was just them calling me “Daddy”…) from women who want to know more about how THEY could become sugar babies.

That’s when the idea struck me.  For as much time as I’ve been explaining the guy’s point-of-view, I never really took the time to give the girl’s point-of-view.  Therefore, since I’ve now helped a number of my female followers become sugar babies (not counting the ones I have for myself), I feel like the advice I have given them is good, and I feel confident sharing it with you today!

Note:  yep, I understand the irony in using all of my personal tips-and-tricks to getting sugar babies to now empower sugar babies to get the most of out sugar daddies like me.  But you know what?  All’s fair in love and war!


What is a sugar baby?

Generally speaking, a sugar baby is a woman who agrees to be in a relationship with a man in exchange for money.  There are many, many other factors that go into the definition of a sugar baby, but to strip it down to it’s most loose, basic terms, that IS what a sugar baby is.


What do I need to know about “sugar” relationships before going down this road?

Again, this is the danger zone:  my opinions on this have earned me a lot of hate, but I’d rather be 100% honest than be a sell-out and never say anything definitively.  So, I’m going to say what I feel a sugar baby needs to be on board with, WITH THE UNDERSTANDING that there are exceptions to every rule:

1. This is a relationship  – Much like you are not a prostitute, he is not an ATM.  You guys are going to get to know each other on pretty decent levels, probably deeper than you’d expect right now.  Be prepared for that.  It’s very common for sugar relationships to become real relationships, or for you to become best friends even after one of you moves on.  One of the things I learned the hard way is that these relationships can be important.  If you’re coming into this just to make money, be aware.  Guys don’t always want just sex.

2. Be prepared to have sex with him – YES, there are sugar relationships out there that are not sexual in any way.  I have no idea where to find them, and if you are looking for that, go ahead and close my blog now, because I can’t help you.  For the rest of you, just acknowledge it.  Part of any relationship is sex.  The good news is that you can still control the “how” and the “how often”.  But don’t think you can get around it unless you are one of the few who is able to find that type of guy:  they all want sex, and most want it as soon as your relationship starts.

3. Be prepared to date below your NORMAL standards – Everyone wants to fuck only Brad Pitt or Magic Mike.  But think about it like this:  would a rich, handsome, Christian Grey-type REALLY be on a sugar website looking for you?  Not likely.  I’m not saying you have to have Buddha or Danny DeVito as your sugar daddy!  But just realize that the tighter your attraction needs to be, the less likely it is you’ll find someone.

4. Don’t get caught up in your emotions YET – I’ll explain this more when we get to the topic of money, but keep in mind that it takes a while to establish a relationship with any new sugar daddy.  As such, don’t lock yourself in at bad terms  initially.  When you are first starting out, your arrangement is 90% terms, 10% relationship.  It’s only as time goes on that the balance turns towards the favor of the relationship vs. the terms.  In fact, as I’ll point out, terms often become more fluid once you’re in a sugar relationship that works.

If you keep those four things in mind before you find your sugar daddy, you’ll be ahead of 99% of the girls who join this lifestyle!


Where do I find potential sugar daddies?

I get this question a lot.  There are a few places, actually.  First and foremost, you can try Craigslist or Backpage in the personals sections.  I would recommend against this, as usually the only people who respond are creeps or “pros” who scout these for the beginners who don’t know anything about the lifestyle.  You can do this (or even the reverse, browsing the guys section for dudes who don’t know what they are doing) if you have experience, but I’d shy away otherwise.

There are actually quite a few sugar baby/sugar daddy meeting sites out there.  I don’t use all of them, just because there’s a small variety of new blood once you’ve gotten passed the first two I use, which I think are the biggest sites.  The first, and my personal favorite, is Seeking Arrangement.  The second is Sugar Daddy For Me.  I’ve gone over them in detail in prior posts, but further down I’ll make several points that will inform how you should fill out your profile.


What kind of sugar daddies are going to contact me or should I contact?

A lot of this depends on what you’re looking for in a pseudo-boyfriend.  Like I said above, you might want to loosen up your normal attractiveness guidelines a bit.  But things like personality and allowance range are big deals that you need to take into consideration.

About Him

If his profile or his messages/e-mails sound dull, guess what?  HE’S DULL.  You can’t force a guy to be personable over the easiest medium that he can use to hook a sugar baby.  Sure, he may be the coolest guy you’ve ever met if you meet him in person, but the chances that even a decent in-person conversationalist can’t type a passable message that makes him seem ok are slim.  Don’t waste your time hunting for diamonds in a rough – you ARE the diamond…

You also need to be prepared to deal with a ton of weirdos and dudes who just want to have sex.  The girl I most recently helped land a SD commented that she quickly developed a pretty easy way of discerning who was a good guy just based on his initial messages, even if he didn’t give his profile much effort.  Not only that, but a DECENT guy stands out like a man among boys when you consider the amount of messages you get from idiots who can’t spell “are”, “you”, and “what”.

If he doesn’t have a picture in his profile, I would ignore his messages unless you haven’t gotten any other credible leads first.  A guy on this type of site who can’t put up a picture of himself has shit to hide, even if this lifestyle is considered taboo.  If you just can’t find a decent guy out there, then if a photo-less guy sent a really good message or has a really good profile, then you can *consider* him.  But again, I’d shy away from them in general until you really have your SD-bullshit meter fine tuned.

About Allowance

This is generally an unpleasant topic for girls.  Basically, there are two reasons girls get into the sugar lifestyle:  they either need the money, or there are all the other reasons.  For the girls that need the money, this lifestyle starts out as more of an emergency than a valuation of self-worth.  For the girls who don’t need the money (and I define “need” here as girls who need a sugar daddy’s money or else she won’t be able to pay all her essential bills next month), this lifestyle is almost entirely a valuation of self-worth.

The needy girls are often the ones who end up entering into a sugar relationship at an allowance amount below what they might get given more time.  These are often the girls who put “Open – Amount Negotiable” in the $$$ box on their profile.  In fact, I think I can definitively state that you’ll never see a girl who’s desperate to pay her bills select “$10,000+” on her profile, haha!

When you’re filling out your profile, put the money you expect to make.  Seriously.  You don’t want to waste a sugar daddy’s time trying to arrange something with you if you put “Open”, but you know you won’t settle for less than $5,000/month.  Likewise, don’t give a slick-talking sugar daddy the opening to convince you to take less than what you want to see him.  If you will only become a sugar baby for a minimum of $1,000/month, or $20,000/month, or whatever the magic number is, put that as your minimum.  Believe me, if you are out of a guy’s range, he’ll leave you alone unless he’s one of the aforementioned weirdos.

One last nugget before moving on, and I already know I’m going to get the most hate mail for this, but I’m not being honest if I leave this out:  consider the possibility that you are overstating your worth.

Ok, now that you have called me a cheap asshole, hear me out.  If you put pictures of yourself up on your profile (which you SHOULD do), and you make your profile as perfectly as you want to represent yourself, and you have your preferred allowance listed as a minimum of $10,000/month…and NO ONE messages you…you might be shooting a little too high.  That’s why I said to set your ABSOLUTE MINIMUM up front:  If you want $10k, but you’ll settle for $2k, don’t get cute.  There’s plenty of time to trade up for a bigger fish, so to speak.  Not only that, but the money isn’t the whole relationship, right?  If it is, and you can’t get your absolute minimum, then take the sign from the universe and delete your account, because you’re not worth what you think you are OR you aren’t going to find the guy who values you that high on these sites.  There’s no shame in just saying that the lifestyle isn’t worth it to you.


I think I’ve found a good guy!  How do I make an arrangement?

There’s a lot of little steps involved.  Finding a guy is the most frustrating part, but the “home stretch” isn’t a cake walk, either.

Step 1:  Set up a meeting ASAP.

If you’ve found a guy you’d like to be in a SR (sugar relationship) with, hopefully he will ask you out for coffee or a meal pretty quickly.  If not, it’s not weird or rude or uncommon to just go ahead and ask him if he’d like to meet.  There are a few ground rules I’ve laid out for the SBs I’ve coached while they look for a SD, and so you need to follow them, too:

1.  Meet in a public place – This might seem like common sense, but keep it in mind.  First and foremost, you want to be safe.  There are crazy fuckers out there.

2.  Do NOT discuss money – This may sound odd, but you do not want to discuss much of your money woes with the potential SD on the first meeting.  Keep in mind that there is a negotiation period when determining an allowance amount, and that the guy wants to get you for as cheaply as he can – if you’re in the $3k-5k range, he wants to get you for $3k or less; you want him to give you $5k or more – do NOT forget this!  Also, most guys that have the true financial ability to be a sugar daddy are also probably decent businessmen.  What do a lot of businessmen do for a living?  Negotiate!  Giving him any financial information about you before it’s time to negotiate will put you at a disadvantage.

3.  Do NOT sleep with him – I hope this is common sense, but guys know within .00000000000001 seconds of meeting you whether or not they want to have sex.  Once they’ve decided that they do, SOME guys (not all) will try to get you to agree to sleep with them before you even talk to them in person.  DON’T DO IT!!!  First of all, you don’t want that guy as a sugar daddy.  Second of all, if you give it up for free, why are you doing this?  And if you agreed to an allowance, you ignored my second rule.  And finally, even if you break my rules and agree to an allowance on the first date, he may just leave and never talk to you again.  Establishing a few dates will make it more obvious what he’s in this for.

4.  Transport yourself – Before you’ve been with him a while, you should drive yourself, take public transportation, or have a friend drive you to your dates.  Don’t risk it.

Hopefully, you’ll find out what you need to know in that first meeting.  If he was using old pictures, he may be less attractive.  He may give you a creeper vibe.  One of my SB friends went on her first date with a guy who immediately started talking about them moving in together – awkward!!!!  Hell, if you’re lucky, then HE’LL tell you all the information you need to know to have a leg up in allowance negotiations.  Ask him about his job, what he does, etc.


Step 2:  Negotiate the arrangement.

Assuming you guys keep in touch after the first meeting, clearly you both want to progress the relationship, and it’s time to hammer out the details.  Before we consider the financial aspect, agree on:

– How many times you’ll meet per month

– What the dates will consist of (I’ve done arrangements where we meet twice during the week for dinner only, and then had a date night on the weekend where we go out and then spend the night together, etc.)

– How you’ll be paid (will you get paid the whole monthly allowance on the 1st?  Will you get paid each visit?  Once a week?  Cash?  Bank transfer?)

– What the “cancellation policy” will be (if one of you has to cancel a date or be out of town for a while, how do you make it up?)

– The “fringe benefits” (do you guys go on vacations?  Do you get weekly shopping trips?  Do you get an apartment?)

You want to get those details above worked out first.  Reason being is that it gives you a clear picture of what amount you are negotiating for.  For example, if you see him once a month, maybe you only need $1,000/mo from him on the 1st.  If you see him 3 times a week, maybe you agree to $12,000/month with $1,000 cash given to you each visit or transferred to your bank account.  Knowing what your obligations are gives you the freedom to know what it is you need in order to agree to his “wants”.

Also, you need to do this all over e-mail.  You can discuss everything via text, but make sure you e-mail him or have him e-mail you what the final outcome is.  Keep the e-mail in your archives.  Not that you should expect to run into a problem where one of you gets fuzzy on the outline of your arrangement, but IF it happens, have the proof in the pudding, so to speak.

Step 3:  Negotiate the allowance.

This is the most crucial aspect of the sugar relationship. I don’t give a shit what anyone else tells you – what you agree to here is what you will end up receiving from him until you have established a good enough relationship that money is irrelevant, or at least less important, to the conversation.  Again, to restate what I said earlier:  with all other factors being equal, the guy wants to pay you the minimum amount possible, and you should want him to pay you the maximum amount possible.  Do not take this lightly.  Don’t treat this as one of those “the relationship is the most important thing to me, money is second” bullshit ideas.  You get what you are worth:  if you agree to a $450/month allowance, you are worth $450/month.  Don’t expect to adjust that rate in a year to $4,500/month, because you looked at a couple blogs online where the girls are getting so much more than you.  You have to treat this as if you’ll never get a dime more than what you can get now, or else you lose out.

Here are a few tips:

1.  Do not make the first offer – I give my friends a simple line to use every time the guy tries to fish for how much she wants from him:  “A lady never makes the first offer.”  Simple.  If he wants you as his sugar baby, he needs to be uncomfortable and put the first offer out there.  Gentlemen hold doors open for ladies, don’t they?

2.  Counter with double his first offer – That’s right, double it.  He will NEVER offer you the maximum amount of his “sugar budget” up front.  If he does, he’s a poor negotiator. Even if that amount is significantly more than you were hoping for, take a chance and double it.  If the guy offers you $5,000/month, tell him you were really hoping to get $10k.  Sure, some guys may laugh, others may never send you another e-mail.  But most are invested in you at this point, aren’t they?  Here’s a simple truth:  guys don’t have many girls fawning over them in these situations.  Just like in real life, girls hold all the power.  If he’s trying to negotiate with you, he wants you.  Make him pay for it!  You’re worth it!

3.  His next offer is serious – If he’s like the 90% of guys trying to get a sugar baby, when you double his offer (which is likely out of his range – even the cheapest SOBs usually offer 50-75% of what the max they have in mind is), he will respond with a number that is much more in line with what his max budget is.  For example, if he offers $5k, and you counter with $10k, his next offer of $6-7k will likely be the top of his range.  You may leave a few hundred or a thousand dollars on the table (say his budget is $7,500), but you’ll be happy that you got that extra $1-2k from him, won’t you????

4.  Keep the perks in mind – Sure, maybe you want $10k a month.  But maybe in exchange for shaving a couple thousand off your allowance, he’ll take you shopping, to spas, and on nice vacations across the country/world.  If the relationship is what will only grow from here on out, it wouldn’t hurt to give him some slack so that he can afford to do the things that a good boyfriend/SD would do:  SPOIL YOU!


I’ve got the arrangement done!  Now what?

Hopefully, once you’ve gotten everything negotiated and squared away, everything that happens from here on out would be gravy.  Nothing more than the normal awkwardness when you go on dates knowing that things are progressing.  If the relationship is good, though, then it should feel like a dream:  you’re getting PAID to spend time with a great guy???  How fucking awesome is that!

I’m not going to spend much time talking about the middle and end of these things, because they are all unique once they get started.  Some will end up bad despite your best effort, some will be so so.  Hopefully, if you’ve followed my advice up until now, you’ll have the highest odds of having the beginning of a fulfilling, meaningful relationship with a great guy who will treat you right and spoil you like the beautiful, deserving woman you are.


I hope you all enjoyed that.  If I come back later and realize I missed something like an idiot, I’ll probably post an update in a new blog so that this will remain largely untouched.

As always, please leave comments below, and feel free to tweet me on Twitter!  I love my followers and readers, and I try to respond to every piece of communication I receive, so don’t be afraid to say hey!

  1. Jody says:

    Im just starting out and I loved this…thank you, it was a great read!!!

  2. prettyBaby says:

    just stumbled across your page not sure what I think just yet but some good advice. I like your line ” A lady never makes the first offer” .

  3. kayla says:

    So far i’ve broken ever rule here ;\ ive just started out.
    Is asking for 350 for a first date bad?
    He also wants sex with me the first meet and i am uncomfortable with this.

    • Liz.bit says:

      Tell him you are uncomfortable then. An hour with an escort is usually around $300. And that is the average Joe paying.

      My advice would be to say “actually, I underestimated my value upon thinking things over. I don’t think this is going to work out.” And then refer him to an escort site. Because he is exploiting you. Don’t be afraid or timid, if he’s already sitting across the table from you over a cup of coffee, he’s ready to hear your offer. As the article mentions above, HE PROBABLY NEGOTIATES FOR A LIVING.

      When you are looking for a sugar daddy, make sure you know your value. What is value? Well, an example would be this: the value of the US dollar is .98 cents in Canada, currently. So you can buy that many US dollars for that many Canadian dollars. Are you hot, are you fit, are you tall, are you well dressed, are you well spoken, are you well educated, are you mind-blowing in bed, are you compliant but confident? Yeah that would be a sugar baby worth a lot more than 10k I can tell you that much. And if the current possible Sd thinks that even 10k is too much, well then he’s looking for someone young and naiive to exploit. And that’s business ethics. You wanna run with the bulls? Better get some good running shoes.

      There are SOOOO many men out there who will spend money on you. You just need to grow a pair of ovaries and woman the F up.😉

      • Liz.bit says:

        edit: I don’t mean that you have to be hot, tall, fit, etc. Sugar babies come in many sizes and shapes and all walks of life. I am just giving you a general figure for that value.

      • Hinna says:

        Hi Liz, I need your help. I’m new to SB-SD and I don’t know what to do. I can’t really think of a perfect approach with my profile.

      • new sugar baby says:

        Hi! I need advice on if the range I chose (and my reasons behind it) are reasonable. I’m not considering the SB life just for the money. I want something meaningful out of it and I don’t want an SD to expect a lot more sexual favors than I’m willing to give because my price is so high.

        I know my minimum is 2k. My range on my profile is 1-3k

        I believe my worth is more than that just by virtue of the questions you asked above. I’m incredibly hot with a smoking body, I’m confident, well dressed, well spoken & educated, good in bed and very accommodating to a man….but as I said, it’s not all the about the money for me. Yes, I know intimacy will be involved, but I don’t want more expected of me than i’m willing to give sexually. I want things to develop as if I was traditionally dating. Plus, I’d rather my SD be able to take me out to do awesome, albeit expensive things, and spoil me with amazing gifts and/or trips. I don’t want him cringing every time he pays me. and the less the relationship resembles a contract the better.

        So, would my range represent that to an SD? Am I selling myself way too short?? I’m low-maintenance and am not trying to live lavishly. I understand to be stress free for my SD, to be fun, non-judgmental and I would give him my genuine support and loyalty.

      • yala says:

        Thank you so much for this response. And i’m just starting out. I requested the same and he requested sex first date too. absolutely not! but im learning! and is asking for a bill of health ok? or a no no?

      • Ngaire says:

        Thanks for that. I give myself a seriously hard time when contemplating becoming a sugar baby. Not hidous, however certainly not a young gorgous 20yr old! you’ve given good advice for me to start off!

      • manda says:


    • Angelic2000 says:

      You’re a moron girl! Geezus!!

    • Lebaby says:

      Thank you so much for this article… I recently joined seeking arrangement and have been contacted by a SD, he says he doesn’t have a lot of time and is married and wants to meet several times a month… I agreed to meet him and I am so glad I read your article… I’m just a little nervous… should I be willing to discuss an arrangement if he brings it up it should this be saved for another date? Can the amount of sex be pre-determined?

  4. Most people don’t even know that the word sugar baby even exsists. In a way i think when a woman says she wants a rich man she is in effect saying she wants to be his sugar baby i.e to be kept.

  5. Hello, Sugar babies are now a days are only available for rich peoples anyways…I needed to thank you for this good read!! I certainly loved every little bit of it. I’ve got you saved as a favorite to check out new things you post And am also there in this profession for long time.

  6. Lisa says:

    This blog has helped so much, even though I still feel somewhat clueless not as much as before🙂 I would love if you emailed me I have so many questions, questions many others might have🙂

  7. Vanessa says:

    Hey I’m very curious about being a sugar baby and was hoping you can give me some more insight on all of this email me back or call 773 554 2897

  8. Vanessa says:

    Sorry lol wrong number

  9. Bianca says:

    what I’m confused about is once you’ve negotiated an amount, or allowence.. who gives first? he will always think you should sleep with him first then he gives you an allowence, to make sure that he doesn’t give you money and you walk, and YOU will want him to give allowence first to make sure you don’t sleep with him, then he walks without giving you a dime.. how does that work??

    • Les says:

      I’m confused about that too. Anyone with insight? Please

    • Stella says:

      Get the money first. Men are so excited and horney before the act that parting with their doe first to enjoy a sexy woman is no problem. Afterwards, it is harder for them to pay without feeling bad about it, like you only did them for the doe and they start to wonder if you really like them… Plus, if they are pushing you to preform first, they may not have the figure you agreed to with them. Also, if you wait until after to collect, you’ve already lost any negotiation power, should he choose to give you a hard time… Being shorted on your fee feels horrible! It’s so much better to walk a way from a jerk before sharing your body with him. Just remember, a dude who will jack you around doesn’t care about you and may even hurt your body while he’s getting his and he doesn’t care. Good clients/daddies make it easy, respect you, and you can have a lot of fun with them.

  10. Courtney says:

    Seriously I wish I would’ve read this the first time I tried looking for a SD!! Totally played myself but now that I know all of this I know exactly how to handle other potentials…thank you so much!!! You’re awesome for this…<3

    • Lola says:

      Question.. i’ve been on 4 dates, we hooked up on the 3rd date.. i believe we initially agreed to an allowance arrangement, but he says he wants to go on a few more dates before he figures all that out. i’m i being taken advantage of? This too, is my first time…

      • michelle says:

        You’re basically sleeping with someone for free. If he hasn’t paid by now he likely won’t be paying you at all. I suggest you walk away.

  11. Ashly says:

    Your like perfect. (:

  12. Kaley says:

    Nice post. Grazie!

  13. jah says:

    what if he wants you to send xrated pictures before the date even though you seen his on the site

  14. jah says:

    what if he wants you to send xrated pictures before the date even though you seen his on the site is it okay

    • Kaley says:

      No nude pics! I’d say ever, but especially before meeting, and getting to know him better. Explicit but not nude is up to you. I’d say no face in the pics, but again this should not come before meeting. He could just want pics all along, with no intentions of meeting. Meet him, go out, make sure he’s a real sd. A real sd does way more you than you do for him. Especially, in the beginning. Be careful, and don’t let anyone take advantage of you!

  15. jamie says:

    A pot sugar daddy wants me to pay to fly to nc from ne to see him. His only excuse why he won’t do it is “plenty of other girls, broker than you have done it”. He claims his job field won’t alloweven a day trip. Is he serious?

    • Kaley says:

      Do not spend your money to see a SD! My last SD flew me in to him even before meeting me in person! We hadn’t even video chat. So, we were both taking a huge risk. A SD will make you pay for nothing! The first time, I did pay for my baggage and shuttle fees to the airport, but he reimbursed me when I got to his city, plus extra to leave with. For flights following this one, he sent me money beforehand.

      “Broker than you.” Don’t fall for this because a real SD will not try to pressure you to spend YOUR money to come see HIM. This guy could actually be someone you don’t want to meet. You know? There’s so many fraud SDs.

      DO NOT pay for a flight to him! If he can’t come see you, or pay for you flight to see him, I’d be very suspicious!

      Be careful!

      • paige lyssa says:

        How did you get started and have the guts to go ? I’m just a beginner but I don’t have a clue where to start ?

  16. paige lyssa says:

    Hi I really want to get started to be a really good escort? I just don’t know where to start or how to even begin to be one,, would you please help me ? X

  17. paige lyssa says:

    Really want to be a suga babe can you please contact me on my email or 07453977097 thanks😉

  18. Lauren says:

    great article!! is there any advice you can you can offer about a sd who is married..im new to all this and could use as much advice as possible, but my way of thinking is that if he is married it takes even more pressure of me, as the sb or no? also i have an account on seekingarrangement and i just get freaked out about meeting someone in person any tips on how to put my mind more at ease?

    • imalittlefox says:

      Hi Lauren, I am myself a European sugar baby in the making. But not without any background.

      -I have dated many men and like men a lot🙂
      -I usually date older men as they are better at sex and worship me (find me more beautiful than a 35 year old lady and can’t believe their chance). I would not get that service form boys my age, because I am just pretty and that’s it. Whereas, I am often better looking than a mature man.
      I still love doing virgins from time to time, male young adults are so cute (but dumb).
      -I meet men at parties, in bars, but also thanks to dating website.

      My advice on dating a MARRIED MAN:
      -If you are feeling uncomfortable with him having kids or being married, just do not see him.
      The man wants to relax, not to have someone make him feel guilty. He wants a fun girl to make him feel young and carefree again, not to pass judgement on him.
      -Do not speak to him about his family unless he does it first. Do not ask questions out of the blue such as :” why do you resort to sugar dating, maybe it isn’t going to great with your wife ? do you want to talk about it? “. You are not his shrink. Time will come when he might want to make you his confidant, but do not force things.
      I think that when you are together with your sugar daddy, you should try to consider you guys as boyfriend and girlfriend. He is not a married man anymore, he is YOUR boyfriend. It may be hard at first but with time, and getting fonder of him, you will naturally feel this way.🙂

      Personally, I avoid married men, unless the wife knows and this is all part of an open relationship.
      I tend to develop qualms and remorse easily.

      My advice on REAL LIFE MEETING:
      -Do not be squeamish when interacting with a man online ! Even if you naturally are shy, try to look confident. Fake sugar daddies will be discouraged and will see they can’t fool you.
      -Skype before meeting them. We have access to handy technologies, use them.
      -If you two guys are feeling comfortable and he trusts you, you can ask him for his name, so that you can google him, be upfront about it. Say: “I want to know if you are real, so I need your name to see if you really work for that company”. Or “Maybe you can give me a link to your online resume ?” Or “If you are part of any social network (fb, twitter) can I see your profile ?”. I have asked those questions to regular men before meeting them.
      An honest man, who has nothing to hide will give you those information.
      -Meet in public, maybe during day time.
      -Do not get in a stranger’s car. Ask a good friend to take you there with their car and ask them to come pick you up after, in front of the date location (not in a desert parking-lot).

      And eventually, during your date, be cheerful. Do not speak about how busy school is, how mean your parents are, how hard is life when you lack money. Attraction is just not physical, so just be your best.

      you should read those two articles on safety.

      Be careful and use common sense. Good luck Lauren !


  19. Cali says:

    Thanks so much for writing this. I am a new sugar baby, and I wish I would have read this before I meet my first pot. Anyways, I have some questions about making the arrangements. I messed up and did not deal with them in the beginning because of the awkwardness.

  20. Marene says:

    I actually like your honesty and your straightforward attitude. This has helped me and I can’t wait to try out your tips to find a SD.
    Always, Marene

  21. linfie says:

    When do sugar babies get paid? And how ? I know no sex until ur paied but how does it work?

  22. sarah says:

    I love this blog!

    I have a meeting arranged with a potential (MARRIED) SD on March 12. This is my first time and I am nervous as he’s asked me to have sex with him after our lunch meeting (providing me connect). I guess I’m fine with this but just don’t know how to discuss the “financial” arrangement.

    I’m aware a SD/SB arrangement involves intimacy but on the first meet…?

    Also his profile says he doesnt want to attract “gold-diggers” (which I’m not) BUT I want to make sure I get my worth to enter into such a lifestyle.

    How much is the right amout and is it okay to have it paid in cash? I share bank accounts with my boyfriend and don’t want him to find out.

    Ideally I’d like £5000 per month in exchange to spend 2/3 times per month together. Is this reasonable?

    Please reply as Tuesday is not that far away!

    • KaleyShi88 says:

      I don’t think that’s too much to ask. Also, no sex on the first meet. This is no different from a “regular” relationship. It’s ultimately up to you, but he needs to respect you, for what te situation is.

      • sarah says:

        thanks for the advice… what about the financials?? Do you think Im okay to ask for cash?

  23. Renee Rodriguez says:

    Hey, so I was looking up some info online about being a sugar baby because I straight up got asked by a guy if I wanted a sugar daddy… I am a waitress struggling through college and debt, so an opportunity like this sounds great…. expect the fact that I have a boyfriend of 2 and a half years that I love. I’ve had a couple of “hook ups” for money before from an old co-worker, but that was literally to put food on my table. He doesn’t know, and would be heart broken if he found out. I’m not a prostitute or anything like that, I have respect for myself and my boyfriend, but this guy is super tempting. He is significantly older than I am, and comes into the diner I work at very regularly and always tips well. He offered to take me out to dinner, casino, etc, and he owns a body shop and offered to work on my car for free and in return wants his house cleaned and sexual interactions every week or so. I feel conflicted keeping this from my boyfriend, but we both are up to our eyes in debt and really need it. We have plans to move in a few months, which is also going to be expensive. I’m nervous and can’t decide if its worth it or not. Any advice??

    • imalittlefox says:

      Hi Renee🙂
      Seems like you are in a difficult situation.

      First, you need to make sure, that potential sugar daddy actually wants to give you allowances, in the form of cash. From what I have read so far, it seems he wants to help you (work on your car for free), provide you with fun (casinos, restaurants) but he never mentioned cash. Maybe he is wary of prostitution regulations. Be sure to ask, cause you might be in for a disappointing surprise.

      Second, how come he asked you upfront if you were looking for a sugar daddy ? How does he know about your financial situation, or that you can stand the fact to have sex for money if you are in a pinch ? Is your coworker you had sex with working at that diner ? Maybe your coworker spilled the beans…
      That potential sugar daddy seems like a nice guy, but speaking in such an upfront way about “sexual interactions in exchange for house cleaning and (possibly) money” I think he kind of sees you like a prostitute.
      Worse, he’s a body shop owner, not a lawyer or a CEO at some big Cie, which means, he has lots of free time on his hands.
      Chances are, he will first think of you as a prostitute, but then, he will want to see you more often, one day, he will think of you as his gf and as his property. Eventually, it will conflict with the relationship you are having with your current bf.

      You should go on SeekingArrangement. I found two potential sugar daddies there that I still need to meet in real life.
      They are both looking for a GIRLFRIEND, so, logically I think they would also expect intimacy, and so do I (and it better be good, or else I’m out). However, none of them has ever told me during our phone calls or emails conversations : “I want us to have sex”.
      I talked about my sexual experiences, my opinions on relationships and on dating older men with one of those men, over the phone. He never said, not even once: “I hope we can have sex🙂 ”
      Do you see the difference (in standards) between my experiences and yours ?
      The good thing is, you were lucky enough to find a sugar daddy by chance. Sure, you didn’t have to put yourself out there on the Internet, but you could use a cropped face-picture of you, and you’d be safe. You’d get more choice using a website and probably, a better sugar daddy, that would see more in you than just a walking vagina.
      Also, If I had a boyfriend like you do, I’d be looking for a very busy man, who is not living in my town, so that he wouldn’t feel the need to see me too often.

      Finally, in my opinion you shouldn’t tell your boyfriend. He might look down on you, he might stop respecting you, knowing you cheating on him, and that was for money.
      Second, in case he’s okay with that sugar daddy thing, don’t let your man become your PIMP. It’s easy money, soon, you won’t be his gf anymore, but a way of earning fast money. You do not have to become a sugar baby for the two of you guys.
      He can become a sugar baby if he wants to. He can have sex with an older lady, or top for a rich bottom gay man, or he could do porn (in straight porn men don’t get their face filmed, after all).

      “we both are up to our eyes in debt and really need it” No, you got it wrong. He has his own debts, and you have yours. Whatever way you choose to solve your debt issue, it is your burden, but also your “reward”.

      If you want a sugar daddy find one, but keep it to yourself.

      All the best.

    • KenzieB says:

      Renee, I understand exactly. Apparently, I have a “wage garnishment”. I didn’t even know what that was.? One of my student loans went unpaid because everything was sent to an old address. Now, I’m in some serious hot water. I thought hey! I’ve dated a lot of jerks for free. What’s wrong with going out with some great guys that could benefit me in a very serious tangible way? My boyfriend does not see it that way. I half brought it up in a joking manner and he flipped! He tends to see things as black and white. Regardless, I love him. I’ve never loved anyone else before. He’s my 1st boyfriend, but I can’t imagine my life without him. I want to meet up with a SD tonight. I’m afraid I won’t be able to live with myself. On the other hand, I think about everything I have to pay this month. I don’t have it! My parents already help me out so much. I can’t keep going to them. They’re in their 60s. Plus, my mom has been dealing with cancer for the last couple of years. They don’t need my BS.

      I want to be honest with my bf, but he’d never stand for it. I know in my heart this isn’t a great situation to put myself in. Then again, it’s the most logical solution. If I didn’t have a bf, I would totally do it. Sometimes we just have to do what we got to do. right? Does anyone have any advice?

      Thank you all!


  24. JJ says:

    I need to advice asap!

    Just connected with an amazing SD who found me on SeekingArrangement.com. He sounds lovely, very handsome, has very deep pockets (by the sounds of it) and we’ve arranged to meet next week for lunch. But the thing is I’ve used a fake name on my profile. I don’t know what to. It’s my first time doing this and I’m scared he may ask me for ID. What shall I do if he wants to transfer money into my bank account instead of providing a cash allowance? I’m super scared. Have I shot myself in the foot? HELP!

    • First off, do NOT hand over your ID. You have no obligation to let anyone know who you are. In fact, he may expect that you’re using a fake name and be using one himself.

      Revealing actual (or more personal) info is your discretion. If he needs more info than you’re willing to provide, he is welcome to miss out on an amazing relationship with a beautiful woman.

      Exchange of money is also something that should be compromised on. If he wants to transfer money, you can usually do that without showing anything more than your account number. If not, cash is the way to go.

      Again, it’s up to your comfort level. If he seems like a genuine guy after a month or two, you can set up an account he can deposit into. I’ve even heard of guys setting up separate accounts in their name and giving their sugar baby a debit card to use on it for whatever. Or prepaid cards with no account info at all.

      Bottom line: there are tons of creative ways to work it out, and the right SD for you will understand and work with you to ensure everything is done right.

      Sent from my iPhone

      • JJ says:

        I was taught honesty is the best policy; obviosuly I’ve got a lot to learn being a SB!!! Thanks so much

  25. Nisha says:

    I’ve had horrible luck looking for a sugar daddy, I live in Canada, and all the sugar daddies who have approached me all want sex. Granted. I haven’t been on Seeking Arrangement very long and the only reason I joined was a huge financial emergency, something that impacted my family and i really needed the money…so I joined. So I finally zeroed in on a seemingly good guy, and he seemed to have a nice personality, and then I met him. But as it turned out, he was willing to meet me, take me for lunch, but he refused to assist me financially until I had sex with him. He kept skirting around the issue, but I never clued in, until he bluntly stated it and I was faced with a choice. He offered me 25k for half an hour with him, and right now, looking at my family’s financial situation… I don’t think i should turn it down. So I didn’t. I’m meeting him tomorrow, but this sugar daddy-baby relationship totally isn’t going as planned and I feel riddled with guilt about the path I’ve chosen. Also, even though he seems like a polite, nice man, I am not attracted to him at all. He’s shorter than me, has a potbelly, not attractive AT ALL, his teeth are messed up (and so I suspect he has bad breath), and the idea of sex with him seems repulsive. I don’t know how I’m going to go through with it, and it’s happening tomorrow. The best I’ve thought of is slugging a few shots beforehand and then getting it over with in a drunken stupor. Does anyone have any advice for me on how to get past his awful looks?

    • imalittlefox says:

      Don’t go for god’s sake !!! If you don’t feel like going, don’t go, trust your gut ! Sacrebleu ! Did he give you money during your first date or is he to give you the money after sex ? If he hasn’t give you the money yet, how do you even know if he has the financial means to splurge 25k or 50k ?? And just to be clear, to me, when you say: 25k I hear $25 000 ?! Did you mean 2.5k by any chance ? This sounds clearly fishy that he wants to have sex with you that fast. He’s treating you like an escort, if he wants an escort, he certainly has the money for that. The point of being in a sugar relationship is to be with someone that treats you like a bf or a gf. You generally take the time to get to know your gf or bf before you have sex with them. I mean, what’s the rush ? I think the guy is not what he says he is, he is going to have sex with you, and leave without giving you any money.
      And I may be delusional but I would not want to receive money in an envelop right after I had sex with someone. I would feel degraded. Money or other form of compensation can be involved (I mean that is the point of going sugar, but I don’t want to see it in such a crude way)
      Stay on seeking arrangement, and look around, you’ll find other men that we will be more gentleman-like.

      I’m sure the owner of the blog will advise you to be wary of that sugar daddy.
      Also, is that your real first name and your last name we can read when you post a comment ?!

  26. N.Patel says:

    I just want to add to the comment I left above ^ that this man also wants to go on vacations with me but for the sole purpose I mentioned above. I’m based in Vancouver but he wants me to come with him on his “business trips” to the states for two-three days at a stretch. I feel nervous about that, but for everyday spent with him he’s willing to pay me 50k. What would I tell my parents? And my sister is already suspicious…it’s not the best situation to be in.

    • deanna somerville says:

      tell your parents your a whore. and a degree and your intellegence will never make you anything close to that in life. go and do it

  27. amee says:


    i have met two men on seeking arrangement.. the first traveled a lot for work so we were only able to meet 3 times in the span of about a month. we had agreed to an arrangement of 8k/month but he said he wanted to wait until he was back in town to start which was fine. upon the official start of our arrangement he wanted to have sex but i refused since up to that point i had only met him twice before and never received any money from him. that didn’t end well as i refused to give it up without having gotten paid.

    the second i met more recently- we had dinner two weeks ago, it went really well and we both agreed that we were interested in pursuing the relationship further and agreed to a financial arrangement. i have spoken to him frequently since then but it seems like something keeps coming up and we are unable to meet. i guess he’s not interested anymore but then why would he keep responding and setting tentative dates (to meet up)?

    i don’t know what I’m doing wrong here? they both seemed to be super interested when they met me but i have seen no follow through.. is this a common thing, or am i missing something here?

    mind you, i looked up both individuals prior to meeting them to confirm their wealth so there were no concerns about having the money. both were easily searchable on google, and i was easily able to validate their (considerable) wealth. i just haven’t been able to access it!

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  29. Elle says:


    I’m currently starting up my SB business. I am not desperate for the moneyave full availability, am often told im beautiful, 5‘9 ,thind can hold a coversation, so I think hell, what makes a girl worth 10-20k a month, and I canwill make that my allowance. What are some tips you have for me??? Also,I have this feeling if Im aiming for super wealthy men, i may encounter some cocky assholes. Do you have any tips for keeping them in line?? As yoy certainly seem to know a thing or 2 about cockiness.lol

    Thanks in advance,

  30. Able Secret says:

    WOW….this is an eye opener. I am just starting with this “career” and I am no spring chicken. I’m 42 and getting interest from men in their 30s to 60s. I really appreciated the negotiating tips…they are golden as are the safety tips. I am in no financial emergency, so I can be picky. In fact, I wrote on my profile I can pay my bills and am not desperate, lol.

  31. Ntonto says:

    U are such a tough cookie and straight forward , it is best to know the truth than a lie … U really are a good person , only if i had a sugar daddy i’d follow all ur tips pity i dont!! Much love

  32. jj says:

    thing is my regular sugar daddy is based in the usa and im in the uk. he’s extremely rich and very generous however he is soon to arrive back in london and asked if he can act out a rape fantasy for £10k. he’s not here all the time and i love spending time with him but is he asking for too much?

    another who ive recently met is so shy but lovely. he wants to see me once/twice every 2/3 months – he has more money and doesnt have strange requests. he’s married with a family (bonus) and i dont want to take advantage of him.

    how can i get exactly what i want from him without sounding like a complete gold digger???

    • The short answer is you don’t need to feel bad about asking for money. As long as you, in your heart, are more concerned with getting to know him and providing him the emotional benefits he isn’t getting at home, you are worth every penny, are you not? If you don’t make it about money, you’ll get more than you ever asked for.

      If you aren’t comfortable with the rape fantasy, politely say that it doesn’t make you feel comfortable. I think role playing is fun, and I’d even entertain that if my partner asked for that to be done to her. As long as its in the privacy of home and he doesn’t physically harm you, I don’t see an issue with it.

      Hope that helps!

  33. Jamie says:

    I have the same concern as one of the other ladies above “who gives first?” Sex or money?
    And the advice given above is great! But I have kinda already broken some of the rules. Me and my potential SD have been emailing for a few days and plan to have dinner this up coming week. This guys seems very respectful. But it was my idea to have dinner and discuss allowance over dinner and he agreed. Now he also says that if everything goes good and we like each other for me to stay the night with him.

    What now? Please somebody help. This is my very first time!

    • Able Secret says:

      Get whatever you want first. Is he your boyfriend or a SD??? A lot of SBs have given out sexually first and then gotten nothing from their pot SD. If he doesn’t give first, find someone else. There are plenty of SD out there that will give out first. I would never have any sex on the first date with a potential SD….get the agreement in writing. AND negotiate your price….in a nice way.

    • cheetee94 says:

      Refuse… settle the amount first. Cause tell me who will pay for a plate he already tasted or ate?

  34. l says:

    Okay so I’m confused. I started my profile about 5 days ago and I got an e mail from a man in L.A and he was totally upfront of want he wants and what he is willing to give (minus the amount) he also said he wants pictures of me either with bra or without and to send them to his email . I told him I wasnt comfortable to send them throuh email so lets make it a suprise. That was yesterday Friday the 24. I havent heard from him again. I think I scared him off. What do I do now?

    • imalittlefox says:

      “he also said he wants pictures of me either with bra or without and to send them to his email ”

      You know where you end up when you give naked pictures of yourself to a guy ? On Xh@mster, in the guy’s “hungry for money sluts” gallery.
      Never give naked pictures of you to anyone !!! Never let a guy film you having sex, and I don’t care if he is your fiance and says that he loves you. This could ruin your life. On Xh@mster you see too many amateur videos or pictures entitled: “my ex wife is such an anal whore”, “my ex slutty gf”, “my ex gf giving me a bj”, “my ex naked wife, she was hot but what a psycho !!!”

      In my opinion, that guy you talked to, was 20 year old and a student with too much free time on his hands. He saw that you started your profile just 5 days ago and thought you’d be green and gullible.
      You just scared away a fake sugar daddy ! Good for you !
      Be strong when dealing with sugar daddies, you can be all sweet and nice once you’ve found a nice man and you know you can trust him.
      Don’t be scared of scaring away men that are just after sex and your body, you will find a nice sugar daddy, a real gentleman, that will see in you a funny, sweet and loving companion, not just a set of tits🙂

      Good luck sweetie🙂

      • Able Secret says:

        I completely agree: Never Never Never send him naked photos. If you want to video tape, do it from your phone or camera so YOU have control of it. Don’t send it to him, ever.

  35. sportsgirl says:

    Okay I’m in need of some help. I’m new at this. A man emailed me on sugar daddy for me his from L.A and he has a photo, he was totally up front with what he wants and willing to give. I’m all on borde, but he wants pics of me in my bra or naked and to send them to his e mail. I told him I’m all on for everything but sending pics through e mail. I’m not comfortable with that so lets make it a suprise. That was yesterday…Friday May 24. He hasn’t set up a meeting or even e mailed me back. What do I do now?

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  37. B says:

    So happy I found this. I have really been working on what to say to guys and how to negotiate.

  38. Tracy says:

    New to sd/sb please help. referring to a previous post.
    what I’m confused about is once you’ve negotiated an amount, or allowence.. who gives first? he will always think you should sleep with him first then he gives you an allowence, to make sure that he doesn’t give you money and you walk, and YOU will want him to give allowence first to make sure you don’t sleep with him, then he walks without giving you a dime.. how does that work??

    • Able Secret says:

      Have him give you cash or use paypal. you just have to be assertive and make sure he gives first. In a nice, flirtatious way you say: “I want to stick to our agreement….you first”….touch his arm, use your sexy voice and come-hither look in your eyes. Get it on the same date you are going to be intimate. If he balks, you know he is fake. Otherwise, you will put out first and he will walk away with free sex. It’s suppose to be mutually beneficial. If he is a real SD, he will have no problem giving you money first. Have an email or something IN WRITING laying out the agreement. These guys are business men….they know the rules. Don’t be played a fool. Also, don’t ever give out your bank account….some fake SDs are out there to drain accounts. I think cash and paypal are the best options, personally. I have read more than a few stories of some women put out first, and never saw a dime. How would you feel? Better to be up front first and make sure he is legitimate. If he’s not, move on. Plenty of SD out there. If you want him for a boyfriend, that is different🙂.

  39. Tracy says:

    Hi, just a quick question. Theres a sd coming to town on business, and wants to meet for a night of ”fun”. what is on ideal price $$. ?

  40. nay nay says:

    why are all men such pathetic dogs… ive met 2 great sugar daddies (or so i thought).. we’ve met no more than 3 times (seperately) and to be fair they have been great company. one is now asking me to get involved in a gangbang and the other wants me to start escorting for him. seriously wtf??? not every girl who engages with a sugar daddy is a whore so why do filthy men think females will sell their souls for a birkin…

  41. helpfromSD says:

    I’m SD and I want all of you to understand that like the above article says, you have value. 99% of guys will wait to have sex with you for at least the first few dates… Trust me, the only time we don’t wait is when we take control and you give in. If a guy is willing to drop thousands, they are willing to wait. Everyone appreciates a challenge and something they have to work for. It gives it value.

    An SD will spend what his budget if he likes you, period. You have 100% of the power to start, it’s easy to lose, but upfront you have it.

    Like the author says aim high, let him talk you down to his budget and then like she said shave off 5-10% and say how about X, now you have extra to spoil me. Now he has gotten a super good deal! No buyers remorse on either side. If you aim to high you risk him questioning his decision every time he has to pay up.

    NOTE: Anyone who wants you to do anything you are uncomfortable with the answer is NO! Time to look for another SD. There are tons of SDs… it’s just that nobody knows the vernacular. If you are a beginner this is even more true.

    Hope this helps someone : )

    • imalittlefox says:

      You could actually help me !
      I am looking for advises from sugar daddies and older men (used to travelling etc…) on a specific matter.
      I already have contacted the owner of that blog, but hey, I could use two points of view from two different persons.

      Note: Thanks for the previous (girl-power oriented ? ^^) post. It was helpful to the budding sugar babbies that we are.

  42. Munchkins says:

    I’m 23 and I met an older guy (he’s 43) while walking home a few days ago. On the day I met him he was sweet enough to buy me a little present, and we’ve been on a date. He brings up wanting to be in a relationship, however I’m not sure how I can steer it into a so-called “relationship with benefits”. He seems like a generous guy as he hints at buying me new jewelry and taking me on vacation. But how do I know if these aren’t just hints of a guy looking to get lucky? Also lately he’s been pushing the sex agenda quite a lot, it also doesn’t help that I find him extremely attractive, so holding back is proving to be quite difficult. How do I show him that I want more of a sugar relationship without him thinking I’m trashy.

  43. Shannon says:

    I’m also just starting out and think I may already have one but I’m confused with a ton of questions! Need someone to explain my situation and answer some questions and give me some advice!

  44. Kristin says:

    Thanx for this post! I’ve recently been asked to be a part of a sugar relationship…I’m not hard up for money by any means i have a great career.. However i am single I’ve never really given this type of relationship any thought so i though t I’d look into the ins and outs of it. This has been extremely informative! However i do wonder if having children would effect a potential SDs decision and of that could turn him away? Can any body help? I am genuinely considering this life style so if any one has any advice please contact me

  45. Reeree says:

    So if my SD is giving me 1000 a month but I want more. How do I go about that ???

    • Reeree, I would just sit down with him and be honest. As long as your reason has to do with you and him, and not you feeling like you are getting less than what’s out there, then there’s no problem.

      If you simply feel like you deserve more, and you feel like your current SD isn’t a good enough partner for you, then you may just want to walk and/or find another SD and then transition to him. Remember, the SB/SD lifestyle is about the relationship, not the allowance. If you are worried about the allowance, then chances are, the relationship is the true problem.

      Let me know how it goes! – TEL

  46. Sarah Clark says:

    After being in relationship with Benson for five years,he broke up with me, I did everything possible to bring him back but all was in vain, I wanted him back so much because of the love I have for him, I begged him with everything, I made promises but he refused. I explained my problem to someone online and she suggested that I should rather contact a spell caster that could help me cast a spell to bring him back but I am the type that never believed in spell, I had no choice than to try it, I mailed the Madurai, and he told me there was no problem that everything will be okay before three days, that my ex will return to me before two days, he cast the spell and surprisingly in the second day, it was around 4pm. My ex called me, I was so surprised, I answered the call and all he said was that he was so sorry for everything that happened, that he wanted me to return to him, that he loves me so much. I was so happy and went to him, that was how we started living together happily again. Since then, I have made promise that anybody I know that have a relationship problem, I would be of help to such person by referring him or her to the only real and powerful Dr Madurai who helped me with my own problem and who is different from all the fake ones out there. Anybody could need the help of the Dr Madurai, his email maduraitemple@yahoo.com) you can email him if you need his assistance in your relationship or anything.

  47. […] The Beginner’s Guide to Being A Sugar Baby […]

  48. bree says:

    Question: Do you thin sugar babies are whores? Or do you respect them? Would you bring them home to mom or not?

  49. Millie says:

    I just wanted to tell everyone about my situation and what has happened. It was not long after the spell that it all happened. I am now with ex and he is more loving than you can imagine. The spell that you have done for me could not have worked any quicker or better. We are happier now than we have ever been. Bless Divinity and you for everything that you have done! Please don’t waist your time with other spell casters as you will get ripped off. There is only one true one out there that I have found and he is here,email to contact him is spiritualspelcaster@gmail.com.

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  51. Lillyluvbug says:

    You are awesome! Thank you so much. I’ve learned more and know how to handle myself now. I’m new to this and I am talking with my first SD. If you have any tips for I would so love them. But reading your blog as helped and given me more confidence and don’t feel like a whore lol. Thank you, thank you!

  52. William says:

    I am a new SD & I met a very nice SB but she is also a first timer so neither of us knows what the going allowance is for an arrangement. I would like to hear from some SB & SD that have had ongoing successful relationships. What allowance is enough to keep the SB happy but not to high so that the SD moves on after a short time.
    I do okay but I am not made of money. I am 55, she is 30 and we both live in Dallas. We are both attractive, she even said if I was 20 years younger and she saw me in a club she would hope I would ask her out.
    We will meet once a week during the lunch hour so it’s not a real involved arrangement. I have read a few articles and one said for short meeting four times a month it is usually $200 a meeting but that seams low to me.
    What do you’ll think?

  53. Anna says:

    I read tons of articles about a variety of subjects and I came across yours after I googled the term and wanted to find out what a sugar babe is. I have to say your article is did a fantastic job coming off very non biased. It was also brutally honest and though I cannot vouch how accurate it is as I do not know, it is very precise and rich in detail. Great Job.

  54. meme brown says:

    Educational stuff I learned so much

  55. Yeni says:

    I love your blog. It widened my perspective on sugar relationships.
    I want to transition into the sugar lifestyle. I am a proud full figured girl. I love my curves, but I know there are a few things that need work (hair, nails, skin, tan, style). I want to make sure my SD sees what I am worth. So, my question is: should I create my profile now or should i focus on what needs done to impress SDs?

  56. Shawna says:

    Hello, this is my second time trying this the first time I wasn’t quite sure if I was ready so eventually I erased my profile. Long story short, this blog is very helpful but I’m still unsure of how I should set up my profile, I was hoping I can get a few pointers. I have already read several of blogs which like this one has helped with the do’s and do nots and the inner rules of a sugar relationship, I just would love some help from someone with experience.

  57. reina says:

    Im happy i found yur website i learned alot i want to become a sb but i dont know where to begin on filling out my profile can yu help

  58. Meda says:

    In desperate need of sugar daddy I’m will to do whatever if it not crazy I’m in need of money please please can some one help me. Email me if your serious about helping me at medasexy21@gmail.com

    • In desperate need of sugar daddy I’m will to do whatever if it not crazy I’m in need of money please please can some one help me. Email me if your serious about helping me at medasexy21@gmail.com

    • Sandy says:


      Sweetheart, this Post already provides you with just about 90 % percent of Suggestions and the Rules needed to be known for living the SB lifestyle. I would advise beginning from the very top of this Article, take your time with reading and comprehending all of the Blogger’d Info, and read every single reply there after, and Good Luck …. Keep it safe !!


      • Sandy says:


        Sweetheart, this Post already provides you with just about 90 % percent of Suggestions and the Rules needed to be known for living the SB lifestyle. I would advise beginning from the very top of this Article, take your time with reading and comprehending all of the Blogger’s Info, and read every single reply there after, and Good Luck …. Keep it safe !!


  59. sugarplum says:

    Love this blog!❤ a real eye opener great writing very elequently put… Educational & informative! Thanks a bunch x

  60. Mimifair says:

    Love it. I am considering becoming a sugar baby. I opened a profile in SA indicating that I would be relocating (different city and country) and would like to start a relationship whenever I get to that city. The thing is, with similar pictures and listing my FUTURE location I got many messages from guys interested in meeting me when I got there, many even younger than me and very attractive (I am 33) But in SA I have not got any messages. Could this be simply because of the location?, because in SA i couldn’t list my future location, rather my current one that is a third world country.

  61. lovely says:

    I’m very confused I have been on a sugar daddy site for about a month nowI have not had any good head I don’t know what I’m doing wrong I am very attractive I take very good care of myself maybe I’m just too old I am 46 but people always think I’m at least in my early 30’s I can’t go anywhere without some guy trying to talk to me I carry myself like a lady and I always look like a lady what am I doing wrong? Help me please. I am African American and most websites the guys are mostly all Caucasian but I don’t have a color preference as long as they are a good person

    • Sandy says:

      Hi Sweetheart,

      I have in common, some of your same descriptions that you mentioned in common, and I have had tons of views and a few requests for dinner within 3 days.

      I can not stress it enough ….Excellent quality Photos are worth a Thousand Words, so make sure that your pictures are on point, exposing the many various sides of your personality … Combination of Diva, Angelic to Hotttttt photos.

      Have you placed a couple of photos in the “Private” section ?? One’s to your comfort level ?? This encourages contact …. Also, if you are not already a paying customer, but make a decision to become one, it places you at a ” Premium Level “, which claims to showcase your profile, providing more visible exposure.

      Willing to help ….. You can contact me at Culbreath46@Gmail.com

      Good Luck hon !!

      P.s …. This Blog and the Replies give Excellent instructions and advice, be sure to read again from the very top to the bottom again if you have to to get better understanding.

  62. beckyboo6585 says:

    what if im the sugar momma and he is older….?

  63. Margaret says:

    What does one do about a man that is on a SD/SB website looking for a long-term partner or relationship? You know the one that seems like he should be on Match.com.

    • Sandy says:

      Lol. Wowww Margaret, that was my same question. I had a SD approach me and that was his exact profile … Long Term Commitment with 1 woman at that.

      I would say that this lifestyle comes with a variable of degree of desires and requests, and there is no ” One Size Fits All ” for the do’s and dont’s ….. Would also assume that if a sd desires that sort of arrangement, that he is a man of good qualities, morals, and willing to treat his sb with the utmost respect ….. But this decision would of course have to be a mutual one between the 2 of you.


  64. v says:

    Hi I’m in the uk and a student. and all the guys on craigslist just want sex the first meet, I am very uncomfrotable with that and have suggested drinks before we go to bed and they straight out “I don’t want a drink” “you are wasting my time”

    This is after we have agreed payment (via email – both have agreed to whatever I have asked) so I don’t know how they look like, they refuse to tell me, and say “my looks are not important if I am paying you” I feel like this is unsafe, of course they have suggested that we could have it at my place if it makes me comfortable. But i have never done this before and am 18.

    in part, looks matter to me somewhat, he has to be decent, pleasant on the eye, takes care of himself (no bad breath etc) but everytime I ask them to tell me how they look, they just shut down and refuse to reply. how do I go on about doing this? please please please help me be tactile?

    • Sandy says:

      Hello hon,

      Never Ever allow a Man to come to your home prior to meeting out in a public place several times, and also be sure to get to know them on your comfort level, not theirs.

      Many a women have been brutally harmed via unsafe situations, moving too fast and not using common sense approaches especially to Safety …. Also, the fact that you mentioned the Terrible Pressure from these guys to become sexual is a serious sign of Manipulation and possible Danger, I have no doubt that they are also assuming that because you are such a young age, that they feel the need to take advantage of you, believing that you are naive and vulnerable.

  65. letsbeonthedl says:

    I love this blog and I’m so happy I decided to do some research before I jumped into the shallow water head first. I just have a few questions. 1) the seeking arrangement site asks you to put in your agreement before you can enter the site. (no idea how to do this. I goggled how to write up a SD agreement and I ended up on your blog. It doesn’t however say how you write it out. I want to see my SD 5 times a month. I want 3,001 – 5,000 a month. I was 90% money and 10% relationship?? l read that in your blog but this sounds like things you would talk about on a meet and greet or on email. Not in your profile. 2) you don’t put the offer on the table first. (best advice, never reveal your hand. Play close to the vest and tip the odds in your favor) How do you get him to talk $$$ how do you get an agreement from him?? Should he pay you on the 1st meeting or after the 3rd date??


    1) you don’t want a guy to have access to your bank account. That’s personal info. A guy with a wireless internet and laptop and figure out a way to get all the personal info on you. Once he’s inside you are screwed!! And not in the good way.

    2) The government picks up on your bank transactions. The more you put in the bank the more interest you occur and the Federal Gov. wants to know where the money is coming from because you will have a paper trail that you will cause you to get stuck paying taxes on. COME ON LADIES!!! COMMON SENSE, WE ALL HAVE IT, LETS USE IT!!!

    3) If we just meet for coffee am I expected to look like I’m going out to the club in an hour?? I’m a jeans and t-shirt kind of girl. Should I ask him?? I don’t want him to have all the power.

    4) I’m new to this and I’m OLDER…almost 40 and I think I’m over the SD hill. Plus I’m not the skinniest girl on the block. Most guys want a 21 year old who are all (look at me, I’m HOT) (no offence ladies) so is this possible for me?? True or False??

    5) SD/SM I could go either way. Will this help me or ruin me on the site?

    6) What kind of profile should I type up to get guys to even look at my page and do I put up a pic of just my body from the neck down, no face??

    email me please at jamik_hhp@yahoo.com I look forward to the information

  66. Layla says:

    Works well for me. Although I prefer weekly allowance. Should I be getting more, I get £250 per meet… I’m 24 and love this type of relationship I’ve been in same one for nearly two years.

  67. hameed says:

    TO +2348112238212 or Via Email: hameedsaedi12@gmail.com,

    some of our mummy digit number.

  68. kaylee says:

    Hey! I absolutely loved this! But I’m new to this, and young. Was wondering if you could give me more insight on all things SB. Here’s my email lovell.kaylee@gmail.com if you wanna teach me and my BBM pin if you have BBM is 24D07469. Thanks again for the tips!

  69. Richard says:

    Both parties should pay attention to perks in a decent SD/SB relationship. These could be *anything*. Does she get a key to his apartment? Does she get a car, or a key to his? Does she get custom hands-on instruction for trading currencies? How about sailing or flying lessons? What’s her monthly clothing allowance, number of pre-paid spa and makeover visits? Vacations either with or without him?

    How about the psychological perks and pains? Does he expect her to be a trophy mistress at parties? Does she get to have actual romantic and/or sexual relations with other people?

    If the financial transaction exceeds $10,000 a year, the IRS wants to get involved. Perks are a nice way to avoid this and also ensure she has a decent lifestyle.

    Oh yeah–one word–Prenup! Good for both of you.

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  71. SB Diaries says:

    […] upon The Escort Lover’s blog. I didn’t much care for his other posts, but really appreciated The Beginners Guide to Being a Sugar Baby. Not only was he helpful, but a lot of people who commented on the post were […]

  72. […] I get into more tips, I’d suggest reading The Escort Lover’s blog post, The Beginners Guide to being a Sugar Baby. Very, very […]

  73. Nicole says:

    So im fairly average looking, and iv been.looking for my sd for a little over a week, im getting nervious . I havent had much luck finding him, i seem to.attract men that arnt.interested everytime someone messages me they only do so for maybe a day or two? What could i be doing wrong?

  74. Johana says:

    I’d like get more one on one guidance with this.
    I have created a seeking arrangement profile but I’m kind of stuck now.
    I have so many questions.
    This is my first time can anyone help me out.
    If you are an experienced SB Id like to hear from you and your experiences🙂
    Please help me out

  75. Hey John X🙂 We loved the article and thanks for the mention! If we can be of help with anything just let us know.

  76. tasha says:

    Hello. I am a AA mother and graduate student seeking to become a SB. I registered with SA, however, I am unsure of what to write for my profile. I was wondering if there were some experienced SB or SD that could be my mentor or give me some personal instructions. Please help me.

  77. suzqwn@gmail.com says:

    Great information. I just signed on to SA a few days ago and have been conversing with a man who lives in another state. In order for us to meet, he has offered to fly me in to the city where he owns a vacation home and stated that I could sleep in one of the spare bedrooms there. Not knowing him at all, I’m not very comfortable with that scenario. What is your advice regarding this situation? A second question…should I ask to be compensated for making the trip?

  78. Rebecca says:

    Oh my god! I wish I had read this three months ago….

  79. margaretha says:

    Hi there,

    Thank you for this write, actually he is right, relationship about sugar daddy and sugar babbies should not only about money in exchange for sex only.

    I ve been sugar babies and ihave 5 sugar dadies, yes im leaving like rich spoiled girl. But the true is , never about money exchange for sex.

    1. My beloved first sugar dadyy never have made love with me , the true fuck. Only kissing, hugging, cuddling etc. But he never bored teaching me about anything i ask ,from business and how i must doing with my life wisely. And the monthly support he never forget even without i ask. And lots of fun holidays to every beautiful places .

    2. My second beloved sugar daddy, same , but offcourse i have made love with him , but not only made love , he teach me anything i like to know even he entertain me when im sad or confused about something. Plus like my first sugar daddy, he never forget my monthly support and never forget asking me to go holiday .i never ask for this

    3. My sugar daddy no 3, he living outside my country but very near. Same, he never forget monthly tranfer and a bunch of gift i always appreciate when he visit me.and we have fun together, laughing , doing adventures together, make love as we like. I really enjoy and comfort with him and so was he.

    4. My sugar daddy number 4, a really busy man, but same never forget give me support monthly and when we meet he always want to give me extra money for this and that……thats i refuse because he give me so much already. When we meet all i do just listen to all his chit chat that never bored me at all. And go to room have sex with rough and he like light bdsm but he always respect my needs.. and always asking me if i like it or not

    5. My sugar daddy number 5, the gentle one, always do the same.

    So my point is your sugar daddy is not atm machine, they are smart people who have needs like me and every sugar babes. If u are fake they can smell ur fake so fast and run away from u.. if u sincere , honest, taking care all his needs precisly witkhout you evenn never asking for this and that they are showering u with all kind…….but i hope youre not greedy but take advantage to learn more important kind from them. My sugar daddy are ceos, higly position person and mostly very very important person, they are smart and have expriences and they not showering u only with money, but knowledge and fascility.

    • ritalolly says:

      Hi dear
      Could u connect me to a sugar daddy, I’m 20 and a very beautiful and sexy girl I’m also honest as well my pin is 2924CBC8.
      Thanks love (kisses) winks…

  80. Abby Normal says:

    I LOOOVE YOUR WEBSITE! I just stumbled on it as I am looking for info on what a sugar baby/call girl might do in situations where the sugar daddy wants to make porn with her for his personal use. I make indie porn with my pals, so this isn’t completely insane request, but I think that it should be a different payscale than the normal “visit” since it’s above and beyond. He is saying he’s never paid for this sort of thing, which kinda seems like a line to me.

    Really don’t have alot of pals to ask about this one…

    • margaretha says:

      Hi abby, if i were you i will say no, because there discreetly issue between my sugar daddy and me, we dont have put any evidence about this relationship include porn video. Thats i told my first sugar daddy when he want to make video porn with me for him if someday i go somewhere he want to remember me. Imnsmiling at him, kisses his eyes and i said to him that i always be in his mind where ever i go in the future. But this all things i can not allowed because i remind him softly how about someone know about it and take advantage from us. He is very wealthy man and have very good reputation, and i will not allowed little mistake ruin it for him

  81. Simply_ gorgeous says:

    Wut do u think about my name is that good name for a sugar baby and I was wondering wut do u think should definetly be in a sugar babies bio

    • margaretha says:

      Hi simply gorgeous, i dont know about name but i think ur name should be true image about yourself. And what ur write in your sugar babes bi is the truth about yourself. Here, let me tell u, to have very rich sugar daddy, i think better u respect him firstly are his intellegently..usually sugar daddy who rich , powerful and have important position are very smart person, if they see your not honest, fake they smell it first time they see u, and they will run as soon as possible. But if you honest, you show yourself as you are, your sincerety…..they will respect you from beginning. Its i called built trust from begiining. I never do lies to my sugar daddy, and they trust me, respect me and our relationship begin with that…..because they said honesty, sincerety and kindness is rare right now…..and to them u will like diamond.

  82. Laritza says:

    I came across your page while researching becoming a sugar baby. I’m still lost and, to be honest, scared to go for it. Your blog has answered a lot if questions and I thank you. I just wish there was a way another, more seasoned SB could take me under her wing and help me be successful at this. I’m.worried I’m too old and not a size 4 like some people like … Anyway thanks for the advice.

    • margaretha says:

      Hi laritza,
      First if you scared, not sure, dont do that. Do survey first, learning and do thinking, makeup your mind.
      Because the most important is Your Feeling, Your Security. Being sugar babes u not suppose to have feeling for this relationship. But u have to be really sincere to your future sugar daddy. Thats the most heartway, because if not so , u will have no potential sugar daddy if you fake, but if you involve your feelings u will always broken heart all the time.
      Second about your size you dont have 4, it doesnt matter, thinking this sweetheart, u better holding bones, or soft , warmth dilligent body? U got ur answer already sweetheart, the most important u have know what is you positif in you, your strength and be proud and confidence with yourself the most important be healthy and fun
      So before doing that , better have study reseach etc to make decision, because its not easy job. Alot of emotional and phisically to be maintanance. Cheers

      • Laritza says:

        I’ve been researching this for a couple if months but I’m still kind of scared/unsure/nervous about it. I’m to the fuck-it point; just do it cause sometimes the best things come out of that leap you take.
        ….I just need someone to guide me🙂

      • margaretha says:

        My darling laritza, there no tutor or teacher to guide you in this fields. U must decide, if you have decide, nervous and scared if usual, but u can put all of that behind and focus on your target. And remember this is discreet work, u must usual to working alone or someone taking advantage on you. Do you have put ad to looking for sugar daddy? Do you have learn about makeup and how to have beautiful appearance? And how to make uryourself look attractive and have quality? Im not saying about really beautiful look or very young or have killer body, not its not the same, but u must know image that will you built about yourself that atrrack very rich, powerfull sugar daddy. If you have private email, i will send u my picture the real one without some changengin and i always give my real picture to my potential sugar daddy the real one and have fully describe of me the honest one. And its always succeed to attrack really high guality sugar daddy.and have long regular relationship so u just not like hooker changing partnes all the time. I think you have realized the danger of it.

      • jasmil says:

        Hello Margare,

        I read your advice. I’m (like everyone here) just starting out. Could use some specific pointers. Also I would love for you see my profile and backs and give me your honest feedback.🙂 thank so much between your advice and this blog I’m beginning to get the gest of things.

        Thank you
        My e-mail is JasmilVcorgi@yahoo.com

  83. Satori says:

    Thanks for writing on the subject… I have been a sugar baby via online dating for a very brief stint… and now getting out of a wasted serious relationship (with a “regular” guy) I really want to give this a try because I believe love can grow from a good friendship and the SUGAR will just be much deserved ‘cherry’ on top…. My comment/question is are there any ladies here interested in keeping in touch and becoming friends, possibly even working together to network and just HAVE FUN for 2014? I am so tired of the lame same old scene in Atlanta and need new friends who are on my level…

    P.S. I’m not motivated by money but I know if so many ditzy, disloyal females can get the sweets then it’s about time I work my magic and really get mine.

    I consider myself an 8/10 (confident not cocky) but I know some people think I’m a 10… I’m an exotic mix of races, cultured, educated, have a good job that lets me travel – it’s just not the kind of money I SHOULD be making… because I love to travel and sleep in late I sacrifice my salary and now I want to find a real man who I can have fun with, adore and spoil/be spoiled by!
    I’d love to meet some trustworthy ladies who FEEL ME on this and would like to make new friends (normally I don’t even get along with most women but I’m open minded and believe that many of you are not your average GAL… so I hope to get some responses)

    SatoriSeed@gmail.com :* thanks galz.

  84. Satori says:

    P.S. I found my new potential via online but not an SD site… he had “Sugar Daddy seeks” on his ad and claims he’s never really done it before but said ‘screw it’ … he sounds very educated and successful from his rants about business in just two emails and one phone call… said he’ll fly back in town for dinner next weekend and possibly take me to Vegas already, my issue in the past has been that I end up getting too comfortable too quickly – I can’t put on a ditzy girl act like a lot of females seem to do, acting outgoing and bubbly if I don’t really feel like socializing is my least favorite thing in the world…. I guess my rhetorical question is; should I shut up and put the game face on? I know every guy is different, I don’t feel he would offer an allowance etc, I don’t want to be exclusive soon at all- what other advice do you have to get them to discuss these subjects or for example give up the goods w/out having to ask for it…

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  86. sarah newell says:

    none of you are ladies. you are disgusting prostitutes taking advantage of lonely old men. if god existed he would see to it that you all burn in hell.

    you fucking monsters

  87. Sugar daddy dating is fun and lucrative

  88. Satori says:

    I’m not seeing as much activity here as I’d hoped:/ P.S. Unless you’re a virgin SARAH go blow somebody lol… Sugar Dating is and has been around forever – you know you want to be a sugar baby otherwise you’re just a serial dating whore yourself lol… I can’t stand double standards… I’m NEWLY SINGLE and after wasting 4 years of my life with a lame guy (who didn’t even want sex as much as I do) I FINALLY REALIZE I should just raise my standards of DATING REAL MEN… It’s not about money for love it’s about putting yourself in the right situation and having a MUTUALLY BENEFICIAL RELATIONSHIP🙂 I’m so excited to finally give this a real shot… already have two trips planned with some old friends, and a few potential SDs from my online profile… Fingers Xd!😉

    • ritalolly says:

      Nice and neatly put girl u really put sarah in her place thumbs up
      P.S I sent u an email with my info regarding u wanting real female friends, i really want us girls to get along well.

  89. roxanne says:

    Very stimulating post. Appreciated it!

  90. Kitty says:

    I love this and the way you’ve written it.

  91. Candice says:

    Fabulous post, thanks. So many girls don’t realize that the relationship should be a good experience for both the daddy and the baby.

  92. Mia says:

    The thought of going down this road keeps crossing my mind and this is the first blog I’ve read that’s made me feel super positive about it – thank you!

  93. Niamh says:

    This is really interesting thank you, I’m obviously not the right age yet to be a sugar baby (15), and I still want to finish school and go to Uni just to see if I can cope on my own – but this gave me a good insight of what I should expect/ how to act if I do become one.
    I will definitely be looking through the rest of your blog, and I case I do ever become a sugar baby in later years I’ll hit you up🙂

    • Sandy says:

      Niamh Sweetheart,

      15 years old ?? ….. You are WAYYYY too young to be involving yourself on this type of Blog, you are a Minor, and should NOT be reading or posting to these types of Adult conversations until you are Age Appropriate.

      P.s ….. I speak to you from a concerned Adult’s point of view !!! Focus on your books hon and graduating through school !!!

  94. Demi says:

    Okay, so i managed to snag a sugardaddy or 2 within the first 3 weeks of me looking. i had lunch with one and we talked he took me home, gave me 1,000$ to start as my based 5,000 a month. no sex involved. Now my second sugar daddy is much wealthier, wants to set me up with 15,000 a month with my own place and car. Recently he decided to take me shopping in NYC and Miami then head to Brazil for 5+ days. This will be our first meet, i’m not to sure how i feel about the sudden getaway, so i talk to a family member who then tells me i should ask for information from his such as name, address, etc. once i confront my wealthier sugar daddy about this, he flips shit! and proceeds to say he doesn’t see the point in use continuing this arrangement,
    he’s so disappointed in me and i should find someone much younger to put up with my drama and bullshit. so i’m sitting about explain how i’m sorry, and i won’t do it again, but he refuses to budge. finally after 2 hours of messaging i say, and i quote ” You know what, you’re right.Fuck it, i never beg for anything so i wish you the best!” and he replies “Take care!”. so at this point i’m fed up. i don’t care too much to ever see or speak with him again. an hour goes by and he messages me on Skype saying “Call me back…. It’s beneficial to u and your buddies!” then texted me “Call me if you like, I had already reserved at the mandarin hotel in NYC for you and your friends on Tuesday night, i can’t cancel it so you and your buddies might as well take advantage of it.” What he’s referring to is the fact that he agreed to a NYC shopping spree with me and 4 of my closest friends, yay right?, then once we had the fall out i thought that was all gone. so i called him 30 mins after he messaged me. And he said i could still go. and even offered to buy me a mac notebook and a new phone just because. PLEASE explain to me this mans insanity. i literally thought we were done now he’s asking me to send pictures non-sexual. and he will call me later. i want to know why he got so upset when i said my cousin needed info and to meet him? is he hiding something? should i not interact with him? i’m soooo lost right now..

    • Sasha says:

      Demi, he’s a psycho and is probably trying to screw you over by getting info from you to use for blackmail. Don’t let him do that to you….

      • Demi says:

        yeah i figure, be cause today is Tuesday and none showed up to get us, nor did he even make a reservation at the NYC hotel…he asked for my name for check in and i gave him my nickname but still, i haven’t heard from him at all since Monday afternoon.

    • ritalolly says:

      What country are u from? I’m new in this sugar dating stuff, and will really like some tips u can share with me, invite my pin dear so we could chat more better: 2924CBC8

  95. Verri says:

    I’m new to this SB arrangement, but absolutely loved this article! i would love more advice but maybe more in private. How could I contact you?

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  97. Lizzywill says:

    Love the blog informatitive

  98. Abbie says:

    Meeting a sd next week …. He’s talking all kinds of sex I won’t give it up that easy didn’t sleep w/ my x hubs for a year after we met….. What if he is a lair n just wants my goods and has no$( I’m an1st time baby) very timid but know I’m worth way more than 15k …….easybim attractive good shape pretty but not I’m pretty and I know I’m not a b word ….( well I can be but I’m a woman we all are!!!) n way

  99. Jasmil says:

    I’m new to the life style, what is the exactly the best way to get paid? I.e. should you tell him to pay you every time he sees you, once a month or what? My concern is that if he gives you the money every-time he sees you and your minimum is 5k what happens if you were intimate with him before the last meeting and he doesn’t give you the rest?

  100. Raven says:

    I’m new to the SB world; and I met my first “SD” on AM. He does seem to like me, seems to be a romantic (sends me flowers all the time, etc)…however, he has not brought up money. And I don’t know how to bring it up, although I made it perfectly clear of what I’m looking for on my profile. Now it seems he constantly texting me, and we are headed towards our third date. I followed your instructions so far; no sex, no bringing up money. But how do I approach things now? On one hand I want to talk about money so that things are clear. On the other, I’m afraid if I do it will turn him off and he will leave. He is a sure bet and I know he has money to spare. Problem is, he hasn’t offered to share it with me yet. What can I do?

  101. Josephine says:

    Hi, great read. Really interested in becoming a SB. Wondered if you knew any great UK sites as I live in England? Also I’d love to discuss a few things with you, see if I’d be desirable in your opinion and if my offers are reasonable. I really appreciate your help🙂

  102. nyloo says:

    Helloo:-)thank you so much for great advices…i am also new to this sd/sb site..i found one guy..he lives far from me in india..and i am in europe..we talked through whatsup and he first asked about how much i want..i wasnt comfortable to talk then he offered me 2000$ which i was shy i said i think is ok..and i dont feel good about it…should i tell him that i want in euro at least 3000 euro?is it ok?

  103. nyloo says:

    One more question how much i should ask ideally?he offered me 2000$..should i tell him 2000 euro or ask more?

  104. Meda says:

    This best blog I seen all night but can you be my mentor I need your help I can’t find sd ): all the website haven’t worked out for me help

  105. Verri says:

    In need of your mentoring!! Could you please help me? My email is verri8825@gmail.com.
    I will give the details then, but would love your advice.

  106. Cya says:

    Great tips in your article. I have been contiplating the SB life style for a number of years.
    Is there a age limit for a SB or when are you just too old?
    What types of pictures should you post on your profile?

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  109. sara w says:

    LOL I ignore this stupid shizz and just be upfront with men. I have a few sugar daddies and only 2 of them get sex, the others are “platonic”. But I also have a thing for older men and to me a lot of these guys are cute so idc

  110. Sugar dating says:

    You must make sure you know what you are getting yourself into. Don’t be a sugar baby only to have regrets later. It’;s fun but you have to plan for your future

  111. sgirl420 says:

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  114. China says:

    Very interesting read. Have never heard of being a sugar baby before. Really appreciated the in-depth view of what the beginning stages entail. Very thoughtful analysis I think. Being an escort, it is a very interesting relationship dynamic I could imagine being a sugar baby and sugar daddy.

    • Rob says:

      Of course lovely I would say many of these women have kids. If your ex has your kids from time to time that even makes it easier. Nothing changes with kids the schedules just have to align like any other sb/sd

  115. bexstewart says:

    Hello, I wanted to know if you knew of any Sugar Daddies that aren’t who they say they are or at least knew where to find them – forums perhaps?

  116. Daisha110 says:

    Well My Problem Is I Found One Off SeekingArrangements & We Exchanged Numbers & He Hit Me Up The Same Night & I told Him I Would Get Back At Him Because I Was At Work & NEVER Hit Him Back Up😑 . Well Now I’ve Read This Blog & I Feel Like I’m Rdy. I Also Feel Like He’s Perfect Because He Is Verified ( Since 2013), Worth 1Million – 2Million
    So Anyways, I Wanna Get Back In It.. Is The Damaged Done? Should I Just Let It Go & Find Someone Else? OR Can I Text Him Good Morning & Hopes He Picks It Back Up?????? #QTNA

  117. Rob says:

    Ok. I a very upfront individual withe emotional security and financial security to make an arrangement work. From a guys perspective, wow are there a lot of strange, and substance abuse issues with these SB’s. I would love to see the physchological profile of many of these people. So lets consider you finally sort through this mess and find one you are interested in. The difficult part from my perspective is not the amount of or desired amount, but the consideration for the time. For instance lets say you can only meet once a month for a day or out of town for 2 days. A woman that would like 10000 a month would be silly but that is what she wants.

    She could clearly find another SD to fill in the gap, but why would I pay for an arrangement 10000 a month when I can only meet for a couple days a month. I would like to see some ideas on amount of time, for the desired arrangement amount. Ideas welcome.

  118. Jessy says:

    Love this how to guide🙂 After reading it Iooked more into this aspect and came across this video on what sugar daddies are looking for in a sugar baby and thought to share it with you guys, maybe it will help you out: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OO1qggIRAgY
    Happy sugaring😉

  119. Michelle says:

    I met my sugar daddy not even 2 full weeks ago but he has been amazing. Last week he have me 1k and today we just did paperwork for my passport. We are going to Bora Bora next month and I’m so excited! We just decided on a 2500 allowance and I think that’s fair. He proposed that I use that for bills and other necessities but I will still get gifts, trips, dinners, and spa dates! I’m 24 and he is 62.
    My only issue is that he wants a serious relationship but with his offer on the table I feel he is a sugar daddy. What do I do as far as communicating our title?

  120. Jana says:

    I met a possible sugar daddy on one of the websites. We emailed a couple times, then had a few conversations on the phone. We talked a little bit about an arrangement, but very vague. Initially, the arrangement was to enjoy each other and allowance. We decided to meet, he flew me out. We had a good time. In person, we talked a little about arrangement but nothing serious. I didn’t sleep with him but did mess around. Now, I’m not sure if I messed things up. He did book me a plane ticket afterwards to travel somewhere I wanted to go. What should I do now? We talked about meeting in New York in a couple weeks but I’m not sure if that will happen. If it does, what should I do? I want to travel, have a good time, get at least 2500 a month. Please give me advice! Now, it has only been a couple days since I saw him.

  121. interested baby says:

    I loved your blog. Very informative & I loved that you were bluntly honest (totally my style). I still have few lingering questions. I am interested in being a SB. I DO however have a current boyfriend. Not as SD, an actual relationship, however it is long distance. I’m anxious to read your advice or opinions on that. Also, I am not fit or skinny AT ALL. I do however have that potential but lack of funds to join a fitness center or pay for the help of a nutritionalist have left such things to go by the wayside. I do feel that besides my fitness, I have many other attractive attributes such as a pretty face, I’m intelligent (school wise and street wise), confident, funny, independent, out spoken, open minded, and very adventurous. Is this something SD might still desire even though my body is not anatomically correct? If so, what range of pay would should someone like me consider herself in? My next and possibly biggest concern is I am not a fan of being owned/told what I can or cannot do. Therefore the independent, strong willed, & outspoken part of me comes out. I’m concerned that because a SD is paying for my company, etc that he ‘owns’ me or will feel that he does. I’d appreciate your thoughts on this as well. Thank you for your time🙂

  122. missie says:

    What if he has already started talking about money?

  123. ritalolly says:

    Hello! I like this post, and I must confess I’m fascinated by it; I’m really searching for a sugar daddy and I’ve also registered in one of the sugar daddy site u listed on this post, but I’m in africa, Nigeria to be precise, so I’m wondering if it’s still possible for me to get a sugar daddy, and for us to meet ASAP. I will really like to hear your reply, u can ping me on 2924CBC8 or follow me on twitter @RitaLolly or preferable facebook: Rita Lolly; if u also have a rich and generous sugar daddy as a friend u can have him invite my bbm pin: 2924CBC8. ( Kisses )

  124. lovely says:

    what if your a single mother with 2 young kids can you be a sb?

    • Mike says:

      Possibly. Tomorrow, I’m having the initial lunch date with a potential SB who I already know has an 18-month-old at home. I’m well aware this will affect her availability, but I’m prepared to deal with it. I can only recommend two things 1) make this clear early on – honesty is best, and 2) never introduce your children to your SD – young children are easily confused.

      • Ngaire says:

        I’m interested in a opinion, Mike. I am a nearly 40 mum, and far from perfect. Pearshaped but not hidous. I’m interested in this kind of set up, however am unsure of demand out there. What do you think? Honestly. Contact me please.

  125. Tatiana says:

    Hi all, I am a SB travelling to the US for a couple of days and want a short term SD to spoil me while I am in town. I have a few Potential SD yo meet, but not sure how to handle this short arrangement since its not a long term thing, and they most prob want sex. Any suggestion on how to handle this with not much time to ‘negotiate’ or get to know them?

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  127. tara says:

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    • Rob says:

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  133. Bee says:

    Well first of all, I’m a newbie on these things, I’m a bit scared at first that’s why I need a lots of searching for tips and tricks safety. So I have been chat with a guy, he’s married, on profile he offered negotiable over $20K without pict. And he messaged me. We chat and send me a pict coz he said he don’t want his pict on publics. We chat and talk about the arrangement that we might comfortable, he asked me flight to his country and offered me to pay the ticket too. But I need visa and etc. Well I guess it takes time for while. So that time that we have before we meet he asks me some questions about personal. Like sex and send pict. I did sent normal pict with full cover body. But he asks my naked pict?!!
    Should I????

    • RB says:

      Did you video chat Bee. I am a man and to be honest I never ask a woman to send me a naked photo. Some do it on their own accord, but I would not. I don’t need a nake pic of a woman to know if I want get to know them. There are picture collectors out there. Just tell hiim you are comfortable yet and see his reaction. Maybe that will say it all. Maybe a bikini shot or similar if you keep talking. To fly to a person’s country you better have a great rapport established.

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  137. Marilee says:

    What an informative website this is! As a new SB, this is invaluable.
    I have a question: I have a potential SD with whom I’ve been exchanging emails for about a week now. We’ve exchanged some photos via email and had some sexy conversations, and now he wants me to send video of me masturbating. He said at the beginning that he is willing to provide an allowance, but we haven’t had a first meeting or negotiated allowance yet. How should I respond to this?

  138. Mia says:

    Hey, I’m a new surger baby, I’ll going on my first date this Tuesday. I would really like to get in touch with you on a more personal level. You obviously know what you’re talking about, and I would love to talk to you more ;be the eyes in the back of my head.
    Send me an email
    Much love, Mia

  139. es92 says:

    Very helpful article and many good comments. Can anyone offer any advice on profiles? Im having a hard time figuring out what to say.

    -In the part about you, how much should you say, I don’t want to bore a POT SD with it being too long but dont want to stand out. i know this should also be more about the type of man you are trying to attract too and not a full bio about yourself really too….
    -section about what kind of arrangement you are looking for… this is really the part i have a problem with. How detailed here? I would think this is something that would be talked about privately but i guess some standards should be said? would an SB say how many times she would meet. it wouldnt seem right to say she wanted $ each time or weekly/monthly here since there is already the part where you select the amount you want and then again, you would talk about each arrangement with each POT SD. right?

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  141. kenzie says:

    I really want to be a sugar baby you should take sometime and get to know me or help me out. I love adventure an danger. And I love money, and pleasing. Its the perfect deal.

  142. amber boudreau says:

    I am embarrassed to mention half the mistakes I’ve made. My SD sent money to my credit card (bad) and wants me to send most of it to his nephew. I feel like im in the middle of a crime. I didnt know his intention or the full amount until after he sent the payment. I’ve been so stressed out. I am currently trying to have the payment reversed and changing my credit card afterwards. Im going to start over with all this info. What a great read.

  143. chantal says:

    Im so glad i stummbled across this! It has answered What do you say? Is there such thing as too much or too little being said?I feel the profile is the true first step in this. Help?

  144. RoseLe says:

    thanks a lot for the blog, So I met the sugar Daddy, he tells me he wants to spoil me. WE met and went on our first date offered me money but I told him it was too little and didn’t take it and he promised we were gonna meet the next day and he will be ready to give me more by then but next day he doesn’t call and the day after DID I RUIN IT?

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  146. Melody says:

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  147. Rosie says:

    Some guy had on his profile he was willing to put up 5-10k.He’s a first time SD, I’m a first time SB. We just had our first meeting and he brought up money. He offered 1500, I counter offered with 3000, but mentioned we’d have to discuss what our visits/ dates would entail(just dinner vs spending the night). I told him to think about it and get back to me once he thought about it. He texted me, offered 1600 for up to 4 visits a month. I told him I valued myself at $2000 allowance for 2 visits a month. He told me to let him know if that changed. I told him I hope he finds a sugar baby to make him happy🙂

    Anyways, thanks for the advice on negotiating, I felt confident and proper during the discussion, and didn’t settle for $400 a visit. I’ve got tuition loans to pay.

  148. kim says:

    I want to become a SB can you tell me on what I should put on my profile I don’t want to word it wrong

  149. Aston says:

    I’ve yet to find a real sugar daddy, don’t think they exist! If they do where in South Africa can I find one?

  150. Grace says:

    Is there any forums or something where I can talk to other sugar babies? I’m just starting out and I have a lot of questions.

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  152. Becca says:

    Please email and help me! First time SB, I live in canada and met a SD who lives in Florida, he wants to make all arrangements and fly me down there and spend the weekend with him we agreed on 6000 a month and 3500 spending allowance a month but I don’t know when to ask for my spending allowance, I am short on cash and don’t want to risk flying down there and something happening and not getting home?!:/ help!

  153. Scarlett​a says:

    Hello, what if the SD who messaged me already stated out all terms and conditions? That means the allowance part and number of meetings per month is set? Is it still possible to counter with the amount he offered on a double level; even though we both hasn’t met yet?

  154. Tatiana Linden says:

    I started a relationship with a sugar daddy, and it was working well for two months. We went on a date every two weeks, he texted me often, and we had this fun thing going where I would randomly make a 3-6 min. pornographic video and surprise him with it in his inbox. We decided on $500 per date, and he always paid it. We were going to do one date every weekend, but since he is so busy and spends half his time abroad on business, it ended up being every other week. If he had to cancel, he always gave me an explanation. He also has this fantasy of watching me hook up with another girl, so I have been trying my best to facilitate this. I have a guy friend who is into the swing lifestyle (he and his gf are 30, I am 21, my SD is 40), and I have basically been the go-between coordinating when all four of us will be available, where we can go to have enough space, etc. I also sent him a great video yesterday, the best one of its kind that I have ever made. To make a long story short, I gave the computer screen a “lap dance” and rubbed a large bottle of vodka against my clitoris. He used to say I was “so perfect”, I “look like a model”, “you’re my porn star”, “you would make any guy c^m”, he was totally into me. But now he hasn’t texted me for a week, he has not acknowledged that he received the video I sent him yesterday, and I am wondering what I did wrong. I negotiated an allowance that is reasonable considering how busy we both are, he has said numerous times that I am attractive and good in bed, I ask him questions about his life and his family to show I am interested, and I have really been making an effort to realize his more elaborate fantasies and do cute extra things like the videos. I am just wondering, what has changed and what am I doing wrong?

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  157. Angie says:

    Wow, reading your blog was great. I never thought I would be doing this or even considering this idea. But I really need the $. I’m not sure its realistic enough what I’m thinking because I’m a single mother of 4 who has not been able to move out of my ex’s house and all because I can’t afford it. I do work very hard, I own a small businesses but its just not cutting it.Then there’s the thought of what example would I be setting for my daughters. All this sounds wonderful I guess in my case I will say we’ll see:-) Thank for all your tips…

  158. Sunny Wilson says:

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  159. kelly says:

    I want a sugar daddy that I ll exchange sex photos with money

  160. amber says:

    I’m just getting started and since i believe in law of attraction i know this will be a success for I’m expecting success. for I’m smart enuf to learn from the ones b4 me as well. I’m excited. Can’t wait. Crap no posts since 2012

  161. Sophie says:

    I just started trying to become a sugar baby. I put on my profile that my minimum is $1k. I’ve already made arrangements w/ 3 different guys, but none of them have discussed prices so far and I’m meeting 1 tomorrow. I’m not too worried since this is really just a test run, but how do you get them to talk about prices if I’m not supposed to mention it first?

  162. macy00 says:

    How can I chat with you. I just created a profile on 3 different web sites. Basically the dudes just PM me hoping to see some titties pic to jerk off at. SD do not exists I gave up. Plus the only thing I was asking was to pay dinner and activities. Not even a monthly pay or whatever. Only liars who likes to create fake web identities because their life sucks….

    From a frustrated chick who will just go out on her own.

  163. roxy says:

    hi i have been trying to set out my own profile for sugar daddy dose any one know how i can make one plz girls can do with some help xx

  164. Krissa says:

    First of all, what’s a TS Sugar Baby?
    Secondly, if you are going to meet them can you ask them to pay for your cab or uber? It gets expensive meeting guys b/c if I drink I don’t drive and where I live there’s very little parking at night anyway. I ONLY meet in public places and won’t let them drive me home. I will if I have a SD/SB relationship however I haven’t found the right one yet. I have only been at this for less than a week and I am getting a lot of interest.
    Thirdly, if your pics are on a site do you think that in the future when you’re getting a job they would be able to find you considering your name isn’t attached to any of the sites? If they didn’t want to give you a job because they found you could you just say you didn’t even know that was there and someone stole your picture? It happens all the time, I wouldn’t be surprised if my pics have been stolen. I tried Match, I’m on Facebook, etc.

    Thank you for all of your great advice.


    • Sophie says:

      For the last one I use pics I don’t use anywhere else. The easiest way to find a person is to go somewhere like Facebook and reverse image search all your photos. A sugar daddy could also do the same with the pics on your profile to find your FB. But if the pics on your profile are nowhere else & your regular photos aren’t anywhere on those sites, it really keeps people from finding you.

  165. Lolita says:

    Hi, I loved your tips on how to negotiate! Haven’t to put it to use yet, but I will!
    So obviously, I’m a sugar babe , still looking, but I wanted to ask how do you make a wealthy man that I met outside in the real world, be my sugardadie.
    Any tips?

  166. Megan says:

    I see that you coach a few sugar babies, would you be able to provide me with a little mentoring as well?

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  168. Brandy says:

    I have a question!

    I have met a SD before from WA who I have been talking to for a week before meeting him in person He flow me to Perth for our first meeting therefore he paid for my flight, accommodation, shopping and spoiled me to rotten the one week I was in Perth although we haven’t had sex and he was single and gave me attractive money hence we have been speaking on the phone for a lot before we met in person. Our relationship lasted 18months and we have became best friends.

    I am now taking different challenge by finding new SD.I have been to many many dates, where I ate, dined, drank, danced, etc with these guys. I know in fact they have the money, have the penthouse, mansions, cars and etc I always do my background check.
    When speak about the arrangement conversation doesn’t last or they ask me how much I want or expecting…

    Am I doing something wrong?
    Why are they avoiding the big question?
    If they want to spend time with me why can’t settle down for an arrangement?

    I am very attractive woman, who can hold a decent conversation, loves to socialise, easy going, update with her fashion and style, who knows how to present in herself and definitely wild in bed.

    I get at least 7-10 message a week from seekingarrangment.com and sugardaddymeet I am bit confused.

    Please help me!

  169. Tracey says:

    I have a serious question please answer it as i’m new to this and really need some assistance. I exchanged details with a so called sugar daddy we got speaking he asked me what my price is so i followed the rule and asked him what he was willing to offer, he then went on to say he will give me 100 English pounds for him to have sex with me….of course i replied no. He then went onto say that’s what the usual sum is and if I’m looking for anymore im kidding myself. Is that true or is he a cheap prat? oh yes he also had the cheek to ask if we can meet at my house. of course that was a no no.

  170. newtothis says:

    Hi, I’ve just joined seeking arrangement and I don’t seem to be getting any responses. I’ve filled out my profile and put up a variety of pics which always gets me lots of attention on normal dating sites.
    Am I not supposed to initiate conversation? Or am I just pricing too high? I’m looking for roughly £1500 to 3k a month, is that a lot? Please reply and help me out, would really appreciate it.

    Many thanks Xx

  171. alexa says:

    What if he wants to have sex with you?

  172. jackie says:

    Love it.. best advice ever….it is so true….thankyou

  173. Diane says:

    I was wondering what happens if he doesn’t bring allowance up on the date? How should a sb approach such situations? This video helped, but was wondering if you guys have additional tips regarding the actual conversation:

  174. Aleesya says:

    Im also new in SB and I am from brunei.. and this info is good n it make me understand more about my role as sugarbaby since this is my first time.. Thanks you😉

  175. Lola says:

    Hi, first off thanks to The Escort Lover for all the helpful advice!

    I’m a new SB and would like some advice on first meetings that require travel. I understand that on the first date your are not supposed to start negotiations or sleep with the John. All makes sense. But, if travel is required for the first meet, then what?

    For example, I’ve been invited to the city (and country) of a potential SD and he has offered to put me up in a hotel for 2 nights during my stay. Is the first night the first meet, and the second night considered the second date and therefore negotiations and possibly sex are allowed? Or should the second date be the second trip? I’m just curious in this type of situation when is best to move to the next stage.

    Any advice is welcomed!

  176. kiahjoi says:

    How many dates do you think a SB should go on with a POT before money is brought up/she stops seeing him if it isn’t? Also, how much casual conversing (via text and e-mail – getting to know each other talk, not sexting) should a SB do with her POT before the arrangement is made? I’ve heard anywhere from “money should be discussed on the second date” to “money shouldn’t be discussed in person at all” to “wait until the 5th date to see if he brings it up.. if not, get out!”

    What are your thoughts?

  177. Hi there, constantly i used to check weblog posts here in the early hours in the morning, since i
    enjoy to learn more and more.

  178. Monika says:

    I haven’t seen anyone bring up two issues:

    1) What should a sugar baby do if the local guys are limited in number and generosity? I notice in my town that college girls advertise sex for $60 or so on craigslist. Escort agencies are struggling. One potential SD I met was offended that I’d charge money for an evening of sex, but he wouldn’t pay a “gift” or “allowance” or anything. Another took me on a great vacation but said he never pays gifts or allowances. There’s only a few dozen guys in my whole REGION on seekingarrangement. What can I do? I’d consider going to the next city over, 5 hours away, but its population is 5x bigger and has a much stronger economy. Anyone have advice for the travel issue? Should I put that bigger city as my location on seekingarrangement?

    2) What are the ‘rules’ about mixing sugar relationships with erotic work (stripping, bodyrub)? I only ask, because in this limited market, I have made a ton of money doing such activities now and then (even in my poor region), and I want to transition to sugar relationships. How can this be done? I’m getting older and want to have a more stable man or 2 in my life that reward me for intimacy and connection over the long term, rather than strangers one hour at a time.

  179. Jazmine says:

    A potential SD whom I have not met face to face yet is requesting to meet 2-4 times per month and wants to do a pay-per-meet arrangement. He offered 200 per meet in cash and I countered with double that. I just want to know if I should have waited until he came into town next to discuss this.

  180. Jess says:

    I negotiated my allowance with this POT, but now I have a dilemma: should I wait for him to give me my first allowance before actually giving it up? If you know what I mean…I found this video on the topic, but still don’t know what to do…I kind of like him but what if I get intimate with him and then he disappears with my allowance? Advice anyone?

    • Monika says:

      As she says in the video, trust your gut. It sounds like you’re worried about this guy not paying or continuing a sugar relationship. Thus, wait. In my experience (small town with lots of unemployed guys), if a guy can act sweet long enough to get action from you, you have no one to blame but yourself. Cash is king. Also, a legit SD has cash budgeted ahead of time if he wants a continuing relationship, and his language will sound consistent about that.

      An analogy comes to mind from the business world. Sales gurus (real estate pitches or whatever) who offer a free seminar will get a low-value crowd compared to a more experienced person who offers a low- to mid-priced seminar. When you pay to attend a real estate workshop, the seller commands a higher perceived value (and they’d better deliver some good value, of course). There’s little likelihood that a person who comes to a free seminar will ever be financially equipped, mentally ready, or in any way committed to investing in any product or service. Being a sugar baby is a serious endeavor, and I don’t mean it to sound like it’s pay4play, but we’re not here to provide free entertainment. It costs a lot of money to look as good as we do, AND be available to just one or a few guys to pamper them with loving attention.

      I think a real sugar daddy ought to leave a better gut feeling in you that he is capable and committed to being generous. So in your case, I hope you’ll wait to be more certain what his intentions are. Then you can confidently share your affections and body with a better assessment of the likelihood of ending up with a one night stand.

      • Jess says:

        Thanks for the advice, Monika! Really appreciate it. You’re right! I will wait a little bit more to see where this is going🙂

  181. Sam says:


    I enjoyed reading your blog and your honesty . Thank you !
    Since you have helped many girls, I was just wondering if you may help me too🙂
    My reasons for wanting to do this , well I love sex very much. I hope you don’t assume I am a slut. I just love sex…. I don’t know why . Additionally I need the money to pursue my PhD .

    It would be great to hear from you.


  182. Jess says:


    I’ve talked to a couple SD potentials on seeking arrangements but they keep saying that they don’t want to do the monthly allowance because it feels like a business transaction, they would rather get to know me and then spoil me or if something comes up help me. How do I nicely say I would prefer the allowance instead?


    • Monika says:

      It sounds like you already have a policy, now stick with it. I get almost exclusively guys who want to pay no allowance, they’d rather pay by the occasion. To me, that’s escorting not sugar nor dating. They’re counting on you to be naive.

  183. GEOERGE says:



  184. alana says:

    I have a potential sugar daddy but he actually doesn’t live in Los Angeles he lives in Florida we’ve been messaging each other I sent them a couple of pictures with clothes we negotiate it an amount because he was interested I agree to the amount. So now he’s asking me for nudes because he wants to know what he’s purchasing before he purchases. Should I send any pictures before any money has been sent.?

    • Jess says:

      Alana, personally I wouldn’t send any nudes ever, even if he is the real deal, you never know where those pictures will end up after you send them. Don’t want them coming back and biting you on the behind.

  185. Jennifer says:

    How should I approach a situation in which multiple guys ask me for my private photos first before even saying hi?

    • Monika says:

      They’re shopping for free photos! We all need to qualify our potential SDs. One thing is they need to be interested based on information you’ve already got in your profile. I tell guys, “You can see my photos in my profile and when you’re ready to discuss an arrangement, please send me a message” or whatever, to set the rules that you’ve already made your profile. If they want to dick around and ask for more, and more, and more, they’re not going to be a real SD. A real SD will want to communicate, not just get more free photos.

  186. Sophie says:

    Right I managed to make it to the arrangement part. i messaged later that day and asked if he received it? he replied: ‘i did’

    The day after i message him now and again asking how he is (not mentioning money) & he replies in a kind manner

    I think he’s paranoid i don’t like him because I didn’t kiss him on the 2nd date!! I said ‘development is key’ & don’t rush etc

    I mentioned I missed him he said ‘ miss you too, come over’ i said i can’t cos staying with friends

    the arrangement: I’ve suggested 2,000 before the next meeting and 2,000 to follow fortnightly

    Question is how can I get him to hand it over?

  187. Rocket says:

    Lots of good info here and lots of bad too. Of course this is 100% written from a woman’s perspective so here is some from a guy. First, a SD is gonna want sex. That is a given and yes most of the guys who have an SD have also seen Escorts and if they were happy with slam/bam thank you … Then guess what ? They’d still be doing that. So they want more than that but do not want a real relationship either. Why? Well, they’d like someone more attractive then they could probably get on their own. And much younger too. It was mentioned SBs need to lower their sights a little bit and most women won’t do that in real life. But, throw some $$$ into the mix and yeah it can work for both sides.

    Now, again what we’ve seen here is women bitching about men. Let me be clear ladies, there are just as many shitty women as men. And most men somewhere along the line have been burned. The reason we want a real pic is to prove you are who you are and look like what you say. Most women LIE about their looks and think they are WAY hotter than they are. I’ve always been amazed when a Fatty lies her ass off and says she’s “cute” and “curvy” and “busty”. No you’re not … you’re Fat !!! So they lie to get men to meet and then get offended when men are no longer interested. Jesus ! So yeah, all men are gonna want a pic, full body pic, and recent. And want to meet face-2-face. BEFORE deciding anything. And men will conclude that if you are lying about your appearance … you are lying about other stuff too. So many will walk.

    And there is the sex issue as well. MANY men will want sex first. Why ? So that the woman has “skin in the game” … she wouldn’t do that (sex first) unless she was serious. Too many men have given women $$$ up front only to have them disappear. Or even worse, being strung along … gimme, gimme, gimme and whey THEY ask for something (like sex) the woman disappears.. And women do this ALL the time; string men along. They are not and will not be committed to anything. THEY GET TO KEEP THEIR OPTIONS OPEN but the guy doesn’t. And we are sick of it. So before we start this, the woman needs to PROVE she is committed to making it work.

    Same goes for dates. As an SB if you expect to be wined and dined and that 3-5 dates before we roll in the bed … well forget it … I can get that in real life (pay for 3 dates and not get laid). Make sense?

    The other HUGE thing is women’s incredible value they put on themselves. Put bluntly, ladies you are not worth NEARLY WHAT YOU THINK. Seriously … you think you are worth $5,000 per month where you put in maybe 10 hrs per week being a SB. Look that is 60K per year and that’s after taxes; lets say that is $80,000 per year before taxes for 10 hrs per week of work. That is more than any doctor or lawyer makes. Is you’re golden pussy worth that ? Not a chance in hell. The ONLY way that is going to happen is if you meet some filthy rich, senile, old coot who can’t get it up. So what are the odds of that ? Why don’t you trying winning the lottery, you’re odds would be better.

    So anyway, there is a little male perspective. Lower your sights on attractiveness. Be reasonable in your expectations for $$$. Realize that is a whole lot about getting sex but not completely. If you want to be successful as an SB it REALLY helps to be attractive (and not Fat). A couple of other things … in a way, SD’s are paying for entertainment. And not just sex. If you are bitchy or demanding we will not be happy (we don’t have to pay $$$ to be around women who are bitchy or demanding, just sayin). I guess what that means is YOU AS THE SB need to entertain us. Most older guys are not too socialable so be FUN, be FLIRTY, lead the conversation and keep it LIGHT. We want to go away feeling better because we saw you and spent time with you. We don’t want to hear about your shitty day or that the kids acted up. Make sense ? Just be fun and enterain us for a change … can you do that 5hrs/wk to get paid ? If you can’t you won’t much of an SB to anybody. Do that (be fun to be around) and do the sex part too and there are lots and lots of men willing to spent $$$ on you.

    That’s all I have to say about that. Good luck !

    • Sasha says:

      Hi, just wanted to say your comment is frankly insulting. It would have been fine if you’d stated it as an opinion but you act like you’re the total authority on the subject when in fact you’re only one fish in a very large sea.

  188. Syrup says:

    Hey I need some advice from ..well your point of view. Please contact me.

  189. Taylor says:

    PLEASE email me. I’ve never done this before and I have a “sugar daddy” that’s very interested in me. Being completely new to this, I have TONS of questions. Please please please. I really need your help.

  190. anney says:

    If, when, and how should I ask a SD for a screening for sexually transmitted diseases? I feel awkward asking but I want to be safe.

    • Monika says:

      do you really think you’re going to get a guy to tell you he’s got a transmissible infection or disease?

      If they don’t bring up the subject first, they’ve got loose values about taking a disease to their wife or future girlfriends. When I’ve been approached by people who don’t realize I have met them and their wife before somewhere, it’s interesting. Usually a married and relatively faithful guy will appreciate a candid discussion. So to cater to those high-value high-standards types of guys, I’ll say before a sex act, “I have condoms with me; I can use one for oral sex so we’re both safe. You’re such a nice guy; i wouldn’t want to compromise your future wife”. Then if he cares about people at all, he’ll say, “oh, do you have something to worry about?” and that gives me the chance to preach my ever-present position on that: “I tested negative for STDs but even that isn’t a guarantee. For example, there’s no test for Herpes until you have an outbreak, but it’s still transmissible.”

      Another thing I do, and I’d love feedback on, is avoid the anal region. The idea is by not touching or licking the underside of the balls and around the opening, I avoid hepatitis and probably other things too.

  191. kate says:

    Hello. Im looking for some advices please.
    I went on two dates so far with a potential sugardaddy and he made it obvious he has a LOT of money and it will never be a problem.
    We went on two dates and at the end of the second date he asked me to come sleep over, but I didnt want to because we didn’t agree on an allowance yet….
    When we were walking on the street I asked him if we should be discussion about this since he basically wanted me to sleep over and he said that he didnt want it to be official yet and prefered waiting. He also said he would give me some money if I was to come over.

    I feel like he wants to try me out…
    What should I be doing?
    also, he said that once it would be official, he was thinking to give me 2500-3000 monthly for seeing each other few times a week.

    Thanks ladies for helpingg !!!

  192. zoe says:

    Hi there,
    How does an SB put price on time? whats resonable per meet? Ive met a lovely SD but because this is my first agreement how do I know if im being undervalued?

    Kind regards,

    Zo x

  193. NumberCrunch says:

    interesting blog

  194. NumberCrunch says:

    ALLOWANCE: Observation: Most of the blogs and comments on the internet regarding SD/SB seem to include comments insulating that any women who plays her cards right, should be able to negotiate a generous allowance of “thousands” per month, and that even 10K–20K per month is pretty reasonably attainable. ANYONE DOING THE ARITHMETIC HERE? Individuals in the highest tax bracket must earn $2 for every $1 they spend, and in order to hand over $10K per month to a SB, a SD would need to generate an extra quarter of a million dollars a year. To do this, one would need to be an “ultra high het worth individual” with either a net worth of 30 million, and/or an annual income of 1 million per year. There are only 211,000 people in this category worldwide. In my state (CA) there are only 13,000. Consider that the majority of that 13K are women, or gay men, Or happily married men, or have a code of ethics that would not allow them to do this sort of thing. So were talking about a pool of sugar daddies, perhaps in the hundreds? Or low thousands at best, FOR ALL OF CALIFORNIA! 50% of the people in the United States live on less that 30K per year, meaning that in California there are likely 50 to 100 million women who could really benefit from an extra 1K or 2K per month (let alone 10K). I think we all understand the extreme high end pretty well: A decrepit elderly billionaire with a very refined and educated fashion model equals 10K-20K per month, no argument, but what about a women who is a 6 or a seven, and/or is over 40, and/or has indicated that she needs there to be chemistry and attraction? A search on SA, returned over 10K women in southern California, who “more or less” fit this description. Of course everyone would like to be sugar babies and make $10K per month, but the reality is that this is not going to happen for most of people : Men, Homely women, unrefined women who speak ghetto, flaky women, whiny woman etc….So what is a reasonable allowance? Well, I will take less salary for a job close to home over a job with an hour commute, and will take significantly less money for doing something I love. So if an SB needs there to be chemistry/attraction and an SD does not really require a younger, drop dead gorgeous SB, I think that the negotiation process should not be such a sore spot. I also notice that many of the women feel they should make more (and not less) than what an escort makes? A heroin dealer makes more than a pot dealer, because they deal with dangerous people and can go to jail, where a pot dealer risks a ticket, and deals with friendly people. So should not a woman who has crossed the line into escorting, make more than a woman who is an SB? If an attractive and personable escort makes $200 per hour, and has to deal with all manner of situations and risks, I would think an SB should be happy with a fraction of that to just deal with one upstanding square citizen, especially if she has ruled out all SD’s who she herself is not attracted to. Am I missing something here? Wouldn’t $1K to $2k per month for 8 four hour visits be reasonable? And before someone points out that that is $50 per hour, consider that the SB is not on her back for most of that time, where the escort actually is.

  195. Emily says:

    So I’m brand new to this I really wanna get started Idk what site I should try? or what to write as my profile? I feel like that’s an important part to find a SD I think your rules will really help me

  196. aliaingoa says:

    I’m truly awed together with your written work abilities and with the structure for your weblog

  197. hunterlion says:

    I need your help not sure how to negotiate this one as im new to the sugar scene and only saw your blog after money has lightly been touched on. He has offered $400 per week and meetings two times a week inclusive of sex and dinner or outings (non specified) but on his arrangement seeking profile he has written his budget as substantial which is a hell of a lot more than he’s offered me. So how do I proceed? What do I ask for ? I simply said I’d prefer to discuss in person but am not sure what amount to try for as I don’t want to push my luck but by the same token I think $400 a week is pretty low – he’s also alot older than me

  198. Jasmin says:

    although it was a great read i still have questions. ive been on seeking arrangement for a year with no luck.

  199. Angela says:

    I like what I am reading so ready to get started

  200. Kc says:

    Hey I did what the guide said. he wanted me to offer an amount first but i turned it back on him then he told me 400 per visit I doubled it and then he said its too much. I don’t really want to talk myself down a price. He should be doing that.What should I do?

  201. Lala says:

    Hello darling, my name is ‘lala” and I stumbled across your page while browsing the web for new suggestion. A litle about me I’m 24 I’m a lingerie model well travel, educated nicely dressed and a descent lover I’ve been a sugar baby since I was 20 but I’m not sure I know what I’m doing I landed my first real sugar daddy 3 years ago we live in different states I visit him every 3 weeks and hr take great care of me like buying my Mercedes, paying my rent,credit cart etc but I need a little more money and lavishness in my life so I’m hunting for a second one for some reason its not happening I put on my profile that my min is 5k plus gifts and occasional trips do you think that’s unreasonable? For whatever reason the guys who approches me have these low ball effort but I refuse to settle .And also o met a much older guy at the gym we went to 3 dates together when he contacted me for a 4th date I told him that I enjoy spending time with him however I’m not looking for a boyfriend I’m looking for a sugar daddy was that a mistake?he told me that’s what he wants as well he keeps asking me out and say we’ll figure out an arrangement but never did when I brought it up he said we’re not at this point yet I think he said that because we haven’t had sex we kissed and touched but no intercourse .when we hung out last night we had fun watched a movie played games and the usual touching and kissing he asked me about my bills,whether or not my car is fully paid for and of I have debts that I want him to rake care of he also said that he’d stop at the bank to get me 1k to start which is very low for me but I was willing to take it but he didn’t stopped at the bank and said he’d do it “tomorrow” I think he said that hoping I’d be motivated to sleep with him my question is should I see him again? Is he a player ?should I put out? Please help please.excuse my spelling English isn’t my first language and also I’m black/Asian do you think that men are willing to give me less because I’m black? Please help

  202. mercy says:

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  203. Dan Tra says:

    one of the best sugarbaby sugardaddy dating websites is definitely http://www.hepays.com

  204. I am very new at this online sugar daddy idea. But am more and more interested every day. But I seriously need to find something very soon. What would you recommend on what website to use to make this as fast as possible. I need all the tips and trades for this hole thing.. Im going to ace this but ib may be a little rusty/shy at this until I see some real action… Anything you recommend or advice me to do please fill me full of the ooyie gooyie steps. And the most fast working way if possible?! Thank you very much. Your help is very appreciated

  205. new suga says:

    Could you email me. As I’m new. I’d love some more advice

    • Hey I am very very interested in getting into this business either escort or sugar baby thing. But I can’t seem to succesfuly figure out how to get started at any of it. So can u please help me on how to get started or where I can get going on this. Ive been wanting to do this for quite some time now. But my first problem was I didn’t have a credit card to use for the ones u have to pay for. Then with the free one for some reason the profile I made didn’t work the way I wanted. Please help me.

  206. Brit says:

    I’m pretty new at this and I have 1 question, if yall do have sex or hang out or whatever, once he pays you what do you say he is paying you for or put in your messages to make sure you can’t get in trouble for prostitution. I understand what we’re doing isn’t prostitution but someone just offered me money and I don’t really know how to make it where I couldn’t get in trouble just in case it was a set up.

  207. bevis says:

    This is an excellent post. Thanks to share it. It is really what I wanted to see. Hope in future you will continue for sharing such a excellent post.

  208. newbiebeauty says:

    What if they are asking for explicit pictures before we meet?

  209. EDWARD says:


    I am by name Edward, and i want to use this great chance to inform you about what can favour you as a young boy,businessman,etc. I have been looking for a sugar mummy since when i was in my University and so unlucky for me i have not been able to get any, bur i have met with some so called agent claiming that they have sugar mummy for me, and due to the fact that i am very desperate in getting this sugar mummy to enhance my finance after school, i believe in him and i sent up to #20000 to him having the mind that he will provide what i want for me, and at the end the reverse was the case, he flew away with my hard earn money.



  210. cay says:

    hey, im super new to this .
    i got a message from a potential sugardaddy.
    hes looking for a sugargirl to move in/ relocate to his country.
    how much money should i ask for in this case?

  211. Watz says:

    This was helpful but I have so many questions. I joined POF and this guys asked me if I ever thought about being a sugar baby and had no idea what one was. Then he told me what he wanted… I am now meeting him tomorrow at a hotel… I’m so nervous…

  212. notaffluent says:

    Very interesting article. So, I am a very poor negotiator. I honestly tell the sugar baby I am interviewing. I want to see you once or twice per week, and I will can afford to give you this much per week. Will that work for you? If she says, no, I need double, then I thank her for her time, and tell her I can’t do that. Then I have to regroup, never bother her again anymore, and continue my search.

    It is not a question of what she is worth, it is what is available as disposable income. Who does not want to date a catwalk supermodel right? But not everyone has the means. Sugar daddies sites allow the lesser affluent “splenda Daddy” (very derogatory designation), to contact those sugar babies who might be beautiful, attractive, yet still more flexible. If lowering her allowance expectation allows her to date a good looking, well mannered, respectful guy, who happens to also provide her with a reasonable and acceptable for her allowance, then why not go ahead and have a great time also. If she only will accept millionaires with $10K per month, then she will have to compete with many others for the very few, nothing wrong with that, some only some sugar babies make it, the rest sit on the bench waiting.

  213. Keyla says:

    This really helped but I think I’m going to need more help.

  214. Nikki says:

    Hi there! The article find you has a lot of information and the writer has much experience. However, I still need a lot advice to go about using the sites suggested in here. Can I share with you about my experience and ask you questions on how I can find a sugar daddy for myself the safe correct way?
    I’m new in this industry and have been working with a booker for a bit over a month. We became good friends along the way. He set me up with quality men, not many but the few have been very good. One in particular asked me to be his sugar baby. We see each other once s week, it’s 500/hour and he usually likes 2 hours. One day he took me to the beach for 3/4 hours and gave me 2000+shopping spree, It’s been nice. I mentioned this to my booker and he became very upset and accused me of steeling and demands a cut saying if it wasn’t for him, I wouldn’t know him. But the sugar relationship is personal, one on one and that’s how my sugar daddy wanted it. My friend/booker became greedy and demanded 450 dollars or he won’t give me any other clients. My sugar daddy was on vaca for 2 weeks, and now is very sick and said he’ll plan something when he feels better, his health is very poor. Now I’m left with niether and trying to do this on my own with out a booker. I’m scared to go online and registered on sugar daddy for me and seeking arrangements, but I did anyway. Other than the tips in the article, I expect to earn 10000/month. But it states not to put that amount, so I put 8000, is that ok?? Do I initiate contact with the SDs profile if I like what I read if they haven’t contacted me?? WHEN do we discuss allowance arrangements? And the first initial meeting, coffe/dinner etc, does he pay me there just for my time to show up cause that’s how i always have done this. Do SDs on this site work that way??? Need advice specifically to these questions before I move forward.

  215. Taz says:


    I’ve decided to enter the sugar world 😊 Very excited by it all.

    I was wondering if you could give me some tips on what kind of things I/ we should have on our profile?

    Thank you

  216. Christy k says:

    I think I messed up. I am 20 years old just started school again, I’m tall dark and cute.
    I’ve been on SA for about 3 months and I’ve met a SD who hasn’t given me any money and we have been on 8 dates already.
    He always buys me dinner pays for my tickets and just recently bought me shoes. We never made an arrangement up until the 8th date where I said my allowance would be $200 shopping trips.
    I’ve sold my self short 😔although he is very kind and understanding and I’ve been too embarrassed to ask for more money I didn’t know sugar babies got up to $1000..is it too late for me to ask for more ?
    Ps. We have developed a really nice relationship he is one of the sweetest men I’ve ever met. I doubt he will feel bad…

  217. Lovlylives says:

    I am have some issues with the mean question you get ask as a sugar baby.
    How much Do you need from me. I don’t know how to answer.
    I am new to this and just need some help.

  218. Lovlylives says:

    Oops typo main not mean

  219. Aly says:

    Two weeks after creating a profile on EstablishedMen I receive a message from my now potential SD stating basically ‘hey I helped a young girl get through college and maybe I can help you’ sort of thing. Very quick and to the point! I was taken back for a while but replied the next day. I got his number and we’ve been texting and talking occasionally. One big thing is that I am not from the area where this man is from. I let him know up front that I did it on purpose because I live in a small town blah blah and he surprisingly has been understanding of that. He wants to fly me out this weekend but I want to go sooner! In one day to be exact… He said I would be staying at his place while I am there (didn’t ask my opinion) and I mentioned that I actually have friends in that area I can stay with while I warm up to him. So I hit up a friend and she explains that I cannot stay with her. What the hell do I do now??? I want to meet ASAP. I work a lot and can’t do this weekend but I don’t want to wait another week. I’m also on my lady days and doing as much as possible to help it slow down and even stop. I’m all tangled up right now but I know he will fall for me as soon as we spend some alone time together and I don’t mean sexy time just yet. But will I really be safe at this strangers home? Will he pay for a hotel room that he cannot even step foot in and I won’t even put out? Will he understand if I explain this to him? Will I seem vulnerable to him, thus diminishing my worth? I just want to be spoiled and shown off, gosh darn it!

  220. H.R.H says:

    I absolutely loved this. I’ve been debating on whether I shud take the plunge and become a SB but after reading your blog… Well there’s no time to lose. I’m gonna go for it. I’m lonely and I deserve the finer things in life using non other than OPM (other people’s money) and I’m tired of being effed over by low life scrubs😜

  221. Jessica says:

    Is it bad I have to be a little buzzed to deal with my sugar daddy ? I’m getting 2k a month to just go out to eat and easier him a little but he’s married so if I don’t drink I feel like I can’t function.

  222. nisha says:

    Someone plz help me. Is it ok for me to want a sugar daddy even though I’m in Jamaica? Do people do that? I mean want a SD from the US when they are from another country?

  223. This site is awesome..I really recommend it…

    Old Moms Anal Join via Paypal – http://oldmomsanal.com/?id=index1

  224. J says:

    I don’t know what to do. I have been involved with an SB for one year. During this time, I have come to care for her a lot. The problem is, my finances have changed and I can no longer afford the monthly allowance. I don’t want to lose her but I can’t keep her at the lifestyle she is accustomed. How, do you guys keep from developing feelings for your SB?

    • S says:

      Hey J,

      To be honest, I think that you two should sit down so that you can explain everything that is going on to her. If she truly cares for you, as much as, you do for her then I believe that she would be understanding and willing to negotiate a new allowance or at the very least compromise with you. Despite you being her SD, you’re still human and shit happens that are sometimes out of our control. I personally would rather you tell me about it and figure something out than be blind sided and we fight and loose everything we have. At least that’s me, every SB is different.

      As for not developing feelings . . . that’s a tough one. Only someone cold and heartless would feel nothing after a year. The fact that you care so much about disappointing her must mean that you two had really amazing and memorable times together, especially if the two of you have been together successfully so long. I’m sure that there’s a part of her that sees you as more than her SD as well.

      If not, then maybe this is a sign that there is something better for you. Everything happens for a reason and sometimes we have to take the signs as they come despite how painful.

      I really hope that everything works out for you and that you two are able to figure something out.

      Best of Luck!


      • J says:

        Thanks for the feedback. I did speak with her and we agreed on a lower amount. I also told her I understand if she wanted to find another SD or a 2nd SD. She’s been trying to find another SD, but it’s been difficult. I think our long term relationship has kinda spoiled her and she forgot how difficult it was to find me:)

  225. jessica says:

    No matter how you try to sugarcoat it, this is prostitution and is illegal in the United States! Furthermore, it is not safe no matter how careful you are. Hopefully you will get your head on straight and quit playing games with your life. The people you meet in this type of environment Are not at all healthy!

    • J says:

      You didn’t really answer my question. There are definitely prostitutes on the sites. For me it’s been more like dating, considering that most of the women I meet didn’t want a commitment or had a boyfriend on the side and lied to me about having someone.

  226. Amber says:

    Me in my SD didn’t have our first date yet but when been taking for a month or so. Is it too early to discuss a negotiable agreement?

  227. Bnay says:

    Thank you so much for putting this out there for us to read. It is very helpful but I do have a question. What if the potential SD is long distance how might a single mother go about that who works full time. I am new to this have gotten some replies and I want to make sure I do this right. Thank you

  228. J says:

    In my situation, my SB is in college and went home for the summer. I paid for her to visit me where I lived and I flew out to visit her. My previous SD lived about 2 hours away from me. Occasionally she would drive up to visit me, but most of the time I drove to meet her at least 1-2x per week or we would meet in the middle for dates. I also flew her to meet me when we went on trips. Regarding agreements, in the past my potential SB and I discussed it arrangement after the 1 or 2nd get together.

  229. adeelmirza says:

    I just want to add to the comment I left above ^ that this man also wants to go on vacations with me but for the sole purpose I mentioned above. I’m based in Vancouver but he wants me to come with him on his “business trips” to the states for two-three days at a stretch. I

  230. gohar shah says:

    I just want to add to the comment I left above ^ that this man also wants to go on vacations with me but for the sole purpose I mentioned above. I’m based in Vancouver but he wants me to come with him on his “business trips” to the states for two-three days at a stretch.i am like

  231. Marie says:

    I need help. Please if you can email me or if anyone who has experience can get in contact with me.

  232. Brenda says:

    Thank you, your information is very helpful. Please don’t stop helping us girls know are true value.

  233. Sara says:

    Hello, I just connected with a SD. We have been communicating every day by phone or text for about 2 weeks. We have not met yet. We have not spoke about an allowance. He has invited me to go to Vegas with him, he is attending a convention. He lives out of state, so Vegas will be our first face to face. When do we talk about an allowance? When I arrive in Vegas? Should I request a separate room? Will I get a fee for the days I am there or is the trip my allowance? Thank you for your response in advance.

  234. […] not “Pretty Woman” and you’re probably not going to date Richard Gere. In fact, The Escort Lover says on his blog that new sugar babies should be prepared to date below their normal standards. […]

  235. Nicorey says:

    I’m kind of new to all of this but I really want to be a sugar baby. The only problem is that I had a huge cancer scare the ended in having to get my breasts removed to avoid it happening again (because there was an extremely high chance it would) anyway, I’m just really worried that no sugar daddy will want to date me because I don’t have them and to be quite honest I don’t want fake ones I mean it’s kinda convenient not having them. I’m young and attractive but I’m worried the lack of boobs will turn any pot SD away

  236. Gen says:

    Now I know what is it like to be a sugar baby, but how is it different about being a female escort?

    • Gen says:

      Do you know any elite escort agency that really provides security for their models?

    • J says:

      It depends on the escort. Most men assume an escort will have sex whenever you want, but an SB is more like a girlfriend. An escort is paid every hour with a set amount of time per meeting. An SB is paid based on the arrangement, it might be money, gifts, trips, or in some cases occasional expenses. I currently have an SB, but we don’t call our situation an arrangement. However, she lives in my condo and drives my car I provided for her (I bought the car and condo for her to use). I help her with different life situations. For example, how to write a resume, interview for a job, budget, how to be a landlord, etc. We have lunch 1-2x per week, we hangout watching tv or whatever 2-3x per week but no money is exchanged for time. I also help her out occasionally with expenses.

  237. Niki says:

    Hey guys if you’re on Kik please join my sugar group, sb’s and sd’s both! #sugarchat just search that to talk with sugars!

  238. marsai says:

    Mar Mar is looking 4 cute black top

  239. Sofia says:

    HELP!!!!! I need one on one tips for becoming a Sugar baby.

  240. Anonymous says:

    You jumped the shark bro. You throw out these numbers like they are real. Yeah, uh-huh….and then the girls discover the truth, the don’t look like a super model, so they get 500-1000 a month tops.

  241. Anonymous111 says:

    You jumped the shark bro. You throw out these numbers like they are real. Yeah, uh-huh….and then the girls discover the truth, the don’t look like a super model, so they get 500-1000 a month tops.

  242. Gail says:

    I’m struggling with how to set up the rules of our arrangement. I met a great guy, our first few dates have been fun, there is definitely chemistry between us. The only thing about an arrangement he’s said is I want an independent, hot girl that can take care of herself. Well I am that, but I am also in nursing school and don’t have enough money for the extras. I was hoping for a $500 a week allowance. Our meetings will be at my apartment, so he doesn’t have to pay for a hotel and he’s married with 2 kids, so many of the traditional pluses sugar babies receive, aren’t an option right now.
    How do I go about getting him to talk about the details of our arrangement. He wants me to take my profile down and I’m definitely into him, but I do need financial help.

    • J says:

      I have only given 1 SB that much support and that was after we became very close. Basically, paid for her to live in a luxury condo, bought a car for her to drive, and etc. However, the monthly allowance was much less when we first started out. She also showed me that she was actually into me and not the money.

  243. Vicky says:

    Can you help me find a SD. Reading this hope me out a lot . I jux dnt no where 2 begin

  244. Vanessa says:

    Hi this is what happened to me on 2011 I started a SD things and he offered me $3,200 monthly, twice per week..so each time $400 …I was desesperated..I’m single mom no child support..so I took it, back then I had some reserves like money saved…to make story short within years it went decreasing to the point now he only offered me $1,000 seeing him twice monthly…$500 and that was because I complain, lots of times I have to ask him to borrow me money to pay my rent and my car..and he makes me feel like he’s doing me a favor, I really want to end this arrangement..even do our agreement was $3,200..
    So, I believe he’s a cheap ass, and he acts like he never agreed to that amount..Unfortunately my emails got deleted to proof our agreement..he is a cheap as and I really want to dump his assistant asap..however, I owe him like $2k bc he loaned me money to pay my rent..I’m 34..look like in my late 20s and
    I’m not fat, I’m a normal person big boobs..slim look like filipina but I’m from South America Colombia…since this was my first time, I think he’s just was taking advantage of me. He even mentioned the other time, oh darling you are 33 you can not expect to make $10k month…he does not take me out anywhere..or buy me anything..and the only reason why I keep seeing him is bc if I don’t have money he’s my last resouce..
    I can’t count with anyone with come to my bills..I had a job but it was not enough..literally my apartment is $2k monthly and I pay it by myself..my car is $500, I support my son no child support…My parents never helped me..I had a great job before I in Real Estate Industry and made great income but the market crashed and since 2007 all was bad..I went to school graduated in 2010 but these jobs paid $15hr full time …is not enough…can you please advice me what to do? I really want to get a fair and good arrangement…I do not like to take advantage of people..and do not want people like this ass take advantage of myself..but I need the money. And he knows it that’s why hes doing it. Thank you🙂

  245. Jenny says:

    Hi there,

    If we negotiate the allowance over the email, will it be considered as a evident of hookers?


  246. Kim says:

    I have a gentleman saying he wants that be my sd, we have met. Everything went well. I have talked with him through messenger since then. It has been about 2 weeks since we both agreed that we would start this relationship and i can’t seem to get him to setup a time to get together. He said that he doesn’t want me sleeping with anyone else while we are seeing each other. Should i move on? Should i tell him that i have another sd wanting to take care of me? I am totally new to this.

    • J says:

      I think you should move on. It sounds like he’s not sure of what he wants. Every-time I started an arrangement, we meet within 2 weeks because I needed my weekly sugar:)

  247. SD 186000 says:

    Wow…lots of good info here. I broke some of the rules of being a good SD…but not totally.
    My current arrangement is amazing..we seem to gel very well, have great play time, pillow talk and love to be around one another. She is busy with school and work, and I am also busy but control my schedule more. We have certainly moved towards becoming best friends…and I hope it can remain that way going forward.

    We first met and started her allowance at $400 a week for weekly play and meal dates…but after the first month I was so busy that we really mostly missed time together. She agreed to reduced her allowance to $1200 a month…now that we trust each other she gets at once, when she needs it and I have it..communication. It is hers….period. I have increased her allowance without her really asking (yes, under her breath she always is saying next month $4500?) moved her to $1400 month 2, month 3 was $1400+500 in house-needs and wants.

    Well, we are always seeing each other; 3-5 days a week sometimes…morning meet and cuddles, late night stop overs, 4-6 hour Sundays…Then the use of a 60K car (850/month), plus insurance…now she is at $2500 + $ 700 for some “cosmetic” bills I offered to cover….Roughly $4000 + gifts…(airline tickets, a pending vacation, etc..)

    It is hard to know what is real in these relationships…we have great sex, but the past month she hasn’t been able due to “issues”…it is kind of like being married….and she still chats with other Pots for fun..tells me but then….who knows…These relationships are 1 text deep…and can end like a puff…BUT I hope not…the GFE is really great.

  248. Annette says:

    Hi! I’m new to this sb thing! And I read this article and it seems helpful. And I was wondering is it weird to do a hourly rate instead a monthly rate because I’m a college student, and my schedule is very busy. And if I can do an hourly rate- what is a good price to start at..

    Thank you!!!

    • Sd186000 says:

      You need to value your time so it sounds logical. But the down side from the SD perspective is that it can feel like a meter is running…and that may become too transactional foe your pots.
      You need to establish boundaries while still creating the image of open and availabke…yes hard to do. Many arrangements start out as a pay to play with 250 to 500 per meet being common in Phoenix. My Sugar Baby is at 3000 per month…paid in lump unless I need to break it up…she is cool with that. ..the cash per is a little like…..well, you know. I trust her so I give it to her I advance.
      What city are you in?

      • Annette says:

        I’m located in los Angeles. Like literally- central los Angeles . I plan on starting at 300. But I’m not trying to get physical with my sd until it’s like long term and official.
        If someone wants dates and causal dinning I believe my rate will start at 3 an hr.

  249. Jezebel says:

    This was so incredibly truthful and helpful, thank you so much for posting this article!😀

  250. I just started this. I’ve been talking to a guy and he let me know he isn’t rich. He asked how much I would do a BJ for and I asked him what he can offer. His response was gas money. As someone new at this, and also haven’t done anything sexual in over a year and a half. I don’t know how to respond since doubling his offer is only probably $10! What do I say?

    I had another guy who I met and he wants to see how we connect on a sexual level. We met in person and just talked. He said he paid his last girl $200-$300 a week. That means I’m looking at maybe $800 a month to have sex. what am I doing wrong?

  251. […] There is a blog called the Escort Lover that also gives REALLY good advise how to step-by-step allowance negotiation, you can check that out here. […]

  252. Gigi Rosé says:

    THANK YOU! I’m fresh to the sugar world and this cleared up many of my questions. I was really worried about how to bring up money but this post was a LIFESAVER! 💋

  253. Viktoriya says:

    So there’s this guy that wants to meet me and we are going to meet at Starbucks and then he asked if I am willing to go back to his place afterwards? Do I go or not? And I asked him to pay me $100 to hand sex I am 22 and he is 42 and works for power line electricity or something. So I’m guessing my price is too low right on the first time like it said he should be the one offering right?

  254. T says:


    I need some help with figuring out whats reasonable for a London SB. I know it’s normal to demand a higher allowance in big cities, but how do I know how much exactly? I’m 5’9, slim, pretty face, smart, high educated. To be honest, I’m a catch. So what do you think? Thanks!

  255. Peter says:

    Hi , My name is Miss Ella from Banana Island
    Lagos. Please I am bored and I need someone
    who can make things lively for me , I need a
    young man , who is vibrant , lively and lovely to
    be with . I will be glad if you live around Lagos,
    will spoil you with money if you can satisfy my
    need. Please this is seriously urgent .
    person should apply through my agent MR
    so that u can get access to me . No

  256. Sandra says:

    I think I broke all the rules you wrote and that’s the reason I have not find a real sugar daddy . Most guys want to sleep with me promise me things and I believed them . Next time I know they have sex with me and after they stop speaking to me . However I’m determined to find an honest sd. You mention that on your page why sleep for them for free , I want to be spoiled and received an allowance , but I don’t like asking for money because it will sound if that’s my focus but is not , I mean is part of it but not completely . I’m willing to make my ad happy in return for time and allowance . Also you metioned that we value our selfs , if we agree say 5 thou. How do I ask for my allowance if I don’t see it after a month . Many of these guys seem to me liars and I feel their taking advantage of me .

  257. M says:

    How much would you pay for a platonic pay-per-date/meet arrangement?

  258. SierA says:

    Dude you are totally amazing British SDs are harder worker then American ones. Girls you got so much more to work with then here. But I’m still positive. Wish me luck X

  259. Rose says:

    I’m new to this will like to start don’t know how any tips

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